2011 Love Letters

2011 Love Letters

Context: These emails center on Becki and Neal’s ongoing struggles in Ethiopia, including conflicts with their (once upon a time competent, trusted) managing director, Mesfin, as well as legal, financial, and health issues. The strain on their relationship intensifies. 90 percent of the money Neal makes driving cross country for Covenant Transport goes to LeaMcD Ethiopian Deaf expenses in Ethiopia. Neal has been sacrificing his hard-earned cash in this story since 2001.

Mesfin was already causing problems, as were others. By his mischievous behavior, Mesfin was trying to snatch LeaMcD Deaf School for himself. This was not the first time LeaMcD’s managing directors did such things.

In December 2010, Neal wrote to Becki:

December 13, 2010,
Subject: Our ship
Becki,
Our ship is the love of GOD. No one can change that. Our enemies have a ship called Self. They believe this is the real name, but beneath it lies another, “Legion” (for we are many). You and I know what they cannot see. We have worked for what they take from us by force. GOD will judge. They will be ashamed, and it will be to His GLORY (Isaiah)

Do what you need to do. My blessing is with you.
Knowing you and I did our best for our friends encourages me. If they stop us, people who took from us will be responsible for the blessings others could have received.
God may have sent someone who seems like our enemy to do His bidding and relieve us of this burden. In this way, He will teach others the lessons we have already learned and are long past.
Maybe the ones trying to snatch it now are the ones God has planned all along to do it, but they did not see the value until they saw us with it. It would be good to shake their hands, give them our blessings, and move on.
It’s hard, funny, and relieving at the same time. It’s upsetting, and yet it’s a relief to think that they steal from God what is not theirs. But we surrender what they try to steal to get those precious things of God, which are irreplaceable.
We tried. We have done what any church would consider impossible. What they thought could never be done, we did. We have been in their faces, in their way. We have been plowing up their fields, destroying their fences, changing their crops, and taking their plunder. It has cost them 100 times more than what we have invested in them, fighting against us.
It has been a good fight that I am proud of. It has been good for me, but I am not proud of the church leaders. They know better. They are evil and can do nothing about it. They cannot change. They will continue to do the same. God has hardened their hearts and will put a great gulf between us.
So if you pack your bags, it will be my blessing and their loss. If they yet receive you, they receive me and my blessing. It is that simple.

I look forward to God’s leading. It will be interesting to see the way God’s hand changes things soon.
Love,
Neal

January 4, 2011
Hello Neal,
How have you been? Is there too much ice on the roads these days? Every day, we are all here praying that God keeps you safe.

The attacks here are getting worse because I have been going through a massive battle with Mesfin. He’s been acting spitefully, using threats and false accusations to damage me and the organization. He refuses to give me all the LeaMcD legal documents and the seal.

I am preparing for the worst, but God and all the staff are with me. You won’t believe how supportive the school has been despite Mesfin’s antics.
They stand up and fight with me, so please don’t get discouraged. Don’t start believing it’s time to halt everything.

Tell me about your time at Karen’s house. How is everyone? Peter called me, and we talked for a time. Wendy, Carolyn, and Keder messaged me on Facebook. I still haven’t responded because I am under a lot of stress this holiday season. It’s extremely challenging to determine what to do with it. I hope to write back to them soon.

Tell me how you are doing. I love you, Neal. You are making a big difference here. If I felt it was hopeless, I would inform you, but the opposite is true. Evil men are constantly attacking me, but the work we set out to do is progressing and successful.

Thank you for listening to the Lord.
Becki

January 7, 2011
Hi Neal,
I’m curious about your silence. Are you depressed? How are you doing?

I am in the thick of things here. I fired Mesfin a few days ago, but he still holds all our important legal documents. He is trying to do bad things and tells me he will do worse things to me than all the others before him. But my case is strong, and all the staff are by my side, so it shouldn’t help him. I expect he will most likely try to find a loophole so that the government agrees with him.

I suppose that will be the end. I’m like a lamb led to the slaughter. But I am stronger than I was two years ago or even a year ago. It is interesting how God lets us go through the fire to refine ourselves.

I think you’d be very proud of Wondwossen. All he wants to talk about are things of the Lord. He has also grown and is ready to take on more responsibilities.
Please write because I need you.
With all my heart,
Becki

January 9, 2011
Becki,
My silence stems from devastation that, yet again, those we trusted forcibly take what we’d willingly provide with time and trust. I am ready to provide all that is theirs and keep what is mine to give or keep. They are evil or mentally disabled; it cannot continue this way.

I love you with all my heart, but I am sick, tired, old, barefoot, short-tempered, devastated, selfish, and withdrawn. I’m broken, but like Revelation 17:17, God has put it in my heart to do His will.

I am ready to sleep now. I will write again soon.
The week after New Year’s is slow.

Love,
Neal

January 9, 2011
Neal,
I wondered why you weren’t writing. Now I understand it. You are heartsick about what is going on here.

I offer no justification to the managing directors, those in whom we placed our confidence, but who betrayed us. I am convinced this is one reason I am here.

God has a mission for us, not only for the Deaf, but also for Ethiopia. In the Bible, God used those who were always in trouble with government officials and church leaders. Even the Church of Christ is part of our mission. Although it seems we are too bankrupt to carry out the task. God knows, we will see!

We are in an evil hour, but I trust God is behind this. He is getting ready to do something significant. Before coming here last time, I had prepared myself for the worst scenario. I thought it related to Abebe’s case with Ejigu, etc. That may also be since the court date for this is not over. It might regard Mesfin if he does not repent of his evil ways. He promised he would be worse than all the others who did bad to me. It’s reassuring to know that we have the entire team supporting us. They are strong with powerful voices.

I am not interested in going through another horror story. But as you say, God has also put it in my heart to do His will. Let’s trust God and not let what we see devastate us.

I love you. Please, pray and pray and pray.
Becki

January 11, 2011
Neal,
Hi Neal, Wondwossen wants to encourage you. Please read his email. I hope you are doing well.

Do not forget to read Wondwossen’s email to you below.
I love you.
Becki

—– Forwarded Message —-
From: WONDWOSSON AYNALEM wond_ay@yahoo.co.nz
To: Rebekah Payne paynenrs@yahoo.com>Cc: nealleon10@gmail.com Sent: Tuesday, January 11, 2011, 5:00:31 AM.
Subject: Re: Greetings,
Dear Neal,
How are you doing? I have not written to you for the last many months. I think of you in my prayers. I am respectful and attend to your blessing work for the Deaf in Ethiopia. For this, you will find a blessing from God. God has planned for your life. For this, you ought to know and understand how much God cares about your life.

I know the problem happens when we have wished for His kingdom. So, we need to know that our house is not here, but we have an assignment accepted by our father, God, for a short time. Now, we have waited for a reply from our Father God to arrange the situation. We will hold a positive direction. I want to care for you through prayer and wish you all the best with the help of God.

Do you know how much we love you in Christ? You need to know that you are our blessing guy because you always give your life for the Deaf in Ethiopia. You have shown us your deep love and kindness.

Neal, we have a big war with evil spirits, since our area of life is God’s Spirit. So, we have run to begin God’s work. Please do not be sad when you hear a terrible story again. We are God’s people. So, we have quarreled with the devil spirit. Do you remember my wrong direction? God let me improve again in His time. If we have sinned, God forgives us in his time. So, we must pray for others to return to their homes.

We love and pray for you, so you must be strong in the Lord.
Yours,
Wondwossen

January 20, 2011
Becki,
You waited long enough. I must send you a letter.
My left leg hurt a lot before Christmas. It went to my lower back at Karen’s house. I could not stand straight up after leaving Cincinnati, Ohio. My back got worse. It took about 5 minutes to figure out how to put a sock on my right foot. I sat on the bed and put on my socks using only two fingers, because my leg was bent. Otherwise, I could not put my socks on.

At Walmart, I dropped my hat on the floor. To pick it up, I let myself down by the shelf, pulled myself up, hesitating when my back said stop, and seized up. Looking at the lady beside me, I told her I could not fake that. Then, she said I feel for you; I have been there myself.
Love you,
Neal

January 20, 2011
Hi Neal,
So sorry about your back and leg. I hope your health improves soon.

Since we are trading war stories, the issue I had in the truck that caused me to stop driving is the sciatic nerve.

At first, I believed a blood clot might be in my leg because of the pain when I walked. Now, my foot is asleep and has been that way for over a week.

The Sports Doctor from around the corner treated me all last week. He said I should be fine; the problem will go away in about 5 days, but it still is not OK. I am glad I am here rather than in the States, where I could not afford to be sick like this.

Before my foot became numb, I was bedridden for a week, crying all the time, because I was in tremendous pain. The Sports Doctor came to my room to treat me. I could not go to him because of all the pain. Fortunately, Alemnish sometimes stayed with me at night to help me get through the worst of it.

I should be involved here at the school because so many things are happening, but God has me staying in bed. I didn’t even feel like sending you an email. The pain had been so bad.

Mesfin stole the LeaMcD seal and our important documents. It’s causing us a big headache. Demeke is also becoming a pain in the neck. In a letter earlier, I told you that Demeke and Mesfin delayed our reports, which I planned to give to Covenant Transport to start their support again. God allows everything for His purposes, so being bedridden these days reminds me of that.

What do you hear about Carolyn and the baby? Kent and Wendy told me she was in a terrible accident; she was OK but with a whiplash. She went into early labor. They are trying to prevent her from having the baby too early. If you have Peter’s phone number, please call him and find out what is happening.

I don’t know about this latest physical attack happening to both of us, with our legs and backs messed up. But remember Job? God let Satan take everything away from Job, including his health. Then, after the test and attack, God restored everything to him. I keep thinking that might happen to us.

You asked me about Mengesha. He is an older deaf man who knows Kidane well. He tried to call me but couldn’t get through. I am eager to hear what he says about Kidane and what is going on. It might help solve some of our problems, but I am not holding my breath.

Did you receive the email that Wondwossen wrote to you? He wants to know that you are all right. I will tell him and the other staff what happened with your back and leg. We will pray for you tomorrow.

Please keep looking up to God. He is our answer to everything. He may let us go through tremendous challenges, but He will be with us through all of it and bring much glory to Him through our lives. I love you with all my heart, Neal. Please hang on as I am.

We are solving the problem with Mesfin. It is difficult to explain in an email. Maybe tomorrow I can call you and tell you about it then. Let me know how you are doing. I will have a phone in my office soon, so we can talk sometime.
Meanwhile,
All my love,
Becki

Note: A meeting was held in a conference room at the railway station office. With the aid of our lawyer, Tamrat and Addis Ababa University Head of Special Needs, Alemayehu, Mesfin was forced by police to give all the important documents back to me, plus a laptop which he claimed to be his, but belonged to LeaMcD.

January 24, 2011
Becki,
I try to ignore the inevitable. I read a book, drive, walk, watch a movie, eat, and think about what I want to say to you, but don’t say to you. It would be too ordinary. You and I are not ordinary.

What I am trying to say to you is not working. I have wanted to tell you often. I hold the phone, working on what I want to say, which takes all my time. Then, instead, I did not say what I wanted to say.

The book I am reading is “Gideon’s Torch,” which is over 500 pages long. The last book I read was about the same.

Character is easier to keep than repair. I heard this today, and this is true.
Sometimes we can find our destiny on the way while we are running from it.
One day, you and I can open our hearts to each other, and the melody will be great when we do.

I have a hard time writing this. I have no trust left. To trust others now would be lying to myself. What am I to do? You can’t blame me because I look at this honestly from an educated viewpoint.
Love,
Neal

January 24, 2011
Neal,
Remember, we are in a spiritual war. These are the last days. Most people are enemies of God. If we are not enemies of God, then people who are His enemies are our enemies. If most are His enemies, it would be understandable not to trust anyone. We must wear God’s armor and be His soldiers. If you had not been doing this, you would not have survived the war. We take our orders from God and do as He wants us. The biggest challenge is to love our enemies and do good to people who use us. Our weapons are not of this earth.

Everything is unseen and in the spiritual realm. Please keep everything in God’s perspective, and do not be discouraged. We know who wins this war. Let us keep fighting in this war to win and not stop until the end. We have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

I know you tend toward negative thinking, but you must keep your eyes on God, not your circumstances. If we look at the water we are walking on, we will sink. But we can keep walking if we look at Jesus. Keep walking on the water, Neal. It is an absolute miracle we cannot deny. I urge you to keep walking on water.

Look only at Jesus, and you can do it. Jesus is with us all the way. I know we are living proof of God’s faithfulness if we do not lose heart. Don’t lose heart. Keep your eyes on Jesus. Walk on the water, my dear and beautiful husband, giving all for God. I love you so much. You cannot imagine. I am always thinking and praying for the time you can be with us.

Everything is still great here, aside from Mesfin. The Lord has this problem under His control. What else can we do but trust God about everything?

You struggled so much in your faith when I was with you in the truck. Maybe you are doing much better now. I pray you are. You always seem to do better in your faith without me, so please be strong. Wait on God and the future He has planned for you. Trust His promises. Do not lose heart.
With all my heart and love,
Becki

January 31, 2011
Becki,
We picked up a load of apples from two locations: Bruster and Chelan.
Washington, driving past Chief Joseph Dam and Grand Coulee Dam, through Spokane, and East on I-90. It was one degree when I stopped to change drivers in South Dakota.

We are going to Opelika, Alabama, with it.
When does your school year end?
I am sorry about your leg hurting.
I have taken time off for only four days since you left.
When am I going to get you a one-way ticket?

My left leg always hurts, and my lower back, hips, and arms hurt. I wonder which of us will push the other around in the wheelchair?

I woke up early this morning, opened a can of cream corn, and ate it.

I need to hear some news about the school.

I am wearing a leaky pair of shoes because they are more comfortable than the cheap pair of new shoes I got. I wear them only when frozen or dry.

I am using the same pillows we had when we drove for Covenant.
We will one day have a house and a bed that doesn’t move.
I love you, miss you, need you.
Neal

January 31, 2011
Hi Neal,
These past few days, I felt well enough to do important things, even though my leg and foot still hurt quite a bit.

The government policy is Inclusive Education. They don’t yet understand that Deaf people need exclusive Education. But I have been pursuing USAID funding by trying to convince the Ethiopian government to support our project proposal.

Tomorrow I will go again to the government offices. If we gain their support, someone from Global Deaf Connection will come to Ethiopia and change the proposal for USAID. I hope to present it to them again soon. Everything looks wonderful.

The students are on a one-week break because they have taken their semester exams. We expect most to excel in the exams. Ten deaf students from Mekinessa School came a few days ago to enroll in our school. They said Mekinessa is confusing because it’s a mixture of deaf and hearing. They are not learning anything. We told them it was too late in the year for them to enroll, but that they could do so the next year.

The staff are fantastic. Wondwossen is our new managing director. Everyone loves and respects him. He may not be as qualified, the same as Mesfin but his heart is good. The same as God uses two truck drivers instead of others with better qualifications, the Lord has chosen a deaf man who depends on God rather than himself. Wondwossen and I pray together on every issue. We rely on God to run the school. You are a top priority in our prayers.

Everyone knows you are our financial resource. They are learning valuable lessons. I have read your email to some of the staff. They know about your discouragement because of Mesfin and how you have nothing for yourself. They observe me often crying for you, which affects them, too.

Mesfin has a problem because he can’t hurt us as he wants. I was forced to make a new seal and have copies of all the essential documents he stole to continue our LeaMcD business. I feel sorry for Mesfin. He only hurt himself because of his pride and arrogance. God let him fall because he did not heed his pride. He is now trying to worm his way into our organization again, but no one will let him return. It is sad what he did to himself.

Neal, what would make you feel better about everything we have gone through with what has happened to Mesfin, etc.? Are you beyond repair? Did the last email I sent you about winning the race help you, or are you ready to give up on Ethiopia? I know you are tired and discouraged, disillusioned, and unhappy. I know your body aches everywhere; you no longer have any trust left, and you want to bring me back to the States. But is sending me a one-way ticket to America the answer for you? Do you no longer have any trust, not even for me? What is God telling you deep down inside your heart?

Marsha at church on Sunday asked me how you were doing. I told her that you were not doing well. She walked away, as if to make her point. I spend little time with her because of her judgment of my being away from you. Is she right in her assessment?

What about Karen and all our family? Are they right and I wrong? Am I taking advantage, and you enabling me, as Alan accuses you? Are we not doing God’s will and being foolish? Are you or I being unreasonable? Is nothing good happening because of our sacrifice, especially your sacrifice? Do you feel forced to support this work now? Has your heart gone from it? Please tell me.

I was hoping you could escape your burden and be with us. Everyone here wants this for you, too. Every day, people here pray for this to happen. But you are talking about a one-way ticket for me to return to the States. What do we have in the States? Our investment is here. People need us here, both of us. I can understand your reasons for giving up, but are you sure it is from God?

Several weeks ago, I had a dream that I did not deserve you and gave you to another woman and put my blessing on it because I wanted you to be happy. I was delighted for you both. I could not believe I had such a horrible dream and woke up in tears, wondering what it meant. How could I have ever dreamed this dream? I remember what you said before I left, that you might have temptation in that direction. Is it true? Did you follow your attraction? I need to understand what is going on with you, Neal.

I love you with my whole heart.
Love,
Becki

February 1, 2011
Becki,
Okay, you passed the test.
You say to that woman who walked away from you; she plays the part of an enemy, a terrorist. Sometimes, the right thing does not fit in with a pre-planned and prescribed job paid for by a large organization.

I will write to Wondwossen. He must be a man of God, walking by faith.
No, I am not doing anything wrong. I have been out of touch with everything and everyone. I am insane, uncomfortable, and not happy.

Your dream is sad. I am sorry. Under no circumstances are you to give me up to another. I do not want another, and there is no other for me.

Karen and the others seem more conservative than I thought. Johnathan listens to Rush Limbaugh and other similar programs. Even Nathan was subdued. I had fun and did not bring up arguments. Karen spent lots of time preparing packages instead of talking, but she means well. It is her way of communication. She works hard every day. Nathan cannot do much hard work. They still do catering.

I love you. You mean everything to me. But I have lost my trust in Ethiopians and need it back.
Loving you with an unusual love. It is a love I cannot understand.
Neal

February 3, 2011
Neal,
I can’t tell you how relieved I am to get your email. I was depressed until I read your last email, letting me know everything is okay with you. So glad I need not give you away to another woman! I am still so stunned to have such a weird dream as that.

Wondwossen is so happy that you will email him. We are the same as you. We have lost a lot of trust, so Wondwossen and I are cautious about everything we do since we do not know which ones will be our next betrayers. But because we know it as spiritual warfare, our only work is to trust God for every step of our walk, and He will keep us protected.

Everything is wonderful with the government nowadays, so we will pursue USAID soon. All the government officials I have talked with say we are in an excellent position now to meet our goals, and they are backing us.

The only snag is that the Ministry of Education has changed its policy to allow no private teacher training, so we will revise the name of what we plan to do. That should work to get government approval to proceed with USAID.

It seems good, Neal. With our enemies subdued, we are on our way to accomplishing more than we ever dreamed. It will be amazing how God will get big glory in several areas.

I’m so glad I passed your test (whatever the test was). I hope to continue to share all the good news with you.

My leg, especially my foot, is still asleep, but I can get around to doing things and slowly walk to the sports doctor. I may need to get an X-ray.

Love you lots, my special guy!
Becki

February 10, 2011
Hey Neal,
How are you? I have not heard from you in a while. I have been busy going places in search of funding. I am hoping to discover possibilities for funding soon.

It is difficult to get around because I have a limp, and my foot is still dead. I checked my foot and calf for possible blood clots, but they said there were none. It is only related to the sciatic issue, so I am relieved, but it is still a nuisance since I take three times longer to get somewhere.

Mesfin said he was returning all the documents, getting nothing in return. That is good news. I hope God changed his heart, and he is sorry.

Let me hear from you.
I love you, my dear Neal.
Becki

February 17, 2011
Becki,
I typed you a lengthy email today. But I think I lost it, and it can’t be retrieved. Here is a part of what I wrote about that woman trying to help you and me.

I said she needed to stop pushing the chain and pull it instead. I explained that as an example, a woman who has been raped and has several children, she comes along and explains to everyone that her children are bastards. How can a Christian say or do this thing? She could help by pulling the chain instead of pushing it. Some people cannot understand that God works differently.
While taking a walk today, two big John Deere tractors caught my attention. They were a team, one tractor pulling and the other, a woman following. I daydreamed that it could be you and me.

If you were different, you could sing like Julie Andrews. Or, we might still be in Tonasket, but that is not where we are. We possess, instead, a deaf school in Ethiopia and a task to complete. Some of those we count as friends are our enemies working against us. If they cannot pull the chain, they need to be quiet.

I am in Monroe, Georgia, delivering at 7:45 tomorrow morning, then I will head to pick up my co-driver.

The license plate light and running lights on this trailer are not working. Tomorrow I will try to get those things fixed. It is the same problem as the last two trailers I had. After arriving in Monroe, Georgia, we will deliver the load tomorrow morning.

I watched a movie called “Castaway.” Do you remember that movie? It is like that for us, being stranded on an island. Left on an island, we are waiting for our ship to come in. All the things that happen are dreadful because of those who do not understand. If they understand, they remain indifferent.

But you and I are still waiting, working, building our ships and ships for others, while multitudes do not know our work from theirs. Living day-to-day, like children, gathering for the day what they want, not thinking forward, not preparing for the cold winter ahead.

I will try to take a few days in about a month and a week when my co-driver takes his next time off.

Peter may be at Wendy’s house at about the same time. That might work out well for all of us. I need to take some time off. I’m tired. “Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you tomorrow… it’s only a day away” (Annie)

I’ve been driving for three nights now with a hazmat load before giving it to a driver to take to Wisconsin. He was going to Kentucky to give it to another driver. In the meantime, I found the same driver, so I gave my hazmat load to him instead.

While visiting, he confided he was dissatisfied with the last three co-drivers he had. The last one got him in trouble by running into something, causing him to lose work for two weeks, making him very unhappy. The guy seems nice and needs a good co-driver, like me, to help him through the rough spots. I hope he succeeds with Covenant. He doesn’t own a GPS.

I still call this GPS “Hideous Hitler.” Many people agree with me. The GPS is like someone who doesn’t know English well. It’s not perfect. You train it with your voice. I haven’t had time to teach it. That, at least, would help.

This afternoon, I called the Safety office, talked to dispatch, and the Fuel office. They let me fuel on I-275 in Atlanta for the first time because it would have been 75 miles to fuel the way they originally said. So, I got special permission to get fuel later. In the Safety office, you’ll pay silver. Covenant could save money because I needed fuel in the Reefer. So now I have a full Reefer.

I need to sleep now. It’s only four hours until it’s time for me to get up.
Love for you,
Neal

February 21, 2011
Becki,
Either I sent it wrong, or something has turned off. Are you getting my mail?
I picked up my co-driver yesterday, February 20. We pick up our load at Ellenwood, Georgia, and deliver in Portland, Oregon.
Love,
Neal

February 21, 2011
My Sweet Neal,
I’ve received your email.

Did you hear about Peter and Carolyn’s new baby boy, Caden Scott McDonald? I got your last email, but I was having trouble emailing you for the previous few days. I appreciate hearing from you. I love you so much and am still searching for a solution for us.

The school is going well. Everyone is at peace and doing their work well. Wondwossen and I pray daily about all the issues we need God to help us with, especially to get you here.

I don’t know how the funds will come, but I am hopeful God has plans for our ship to come soon.

My dead foot remains. There must be a good reason for it.

I continue working on USAID funding, etc.

I enjoyed your last long email. You are getting handy with the phone’s voice recognition. It was confusing in some spots, but most of it was understandable. Keep practicing. It is great that you learned how to do that.

Tomorrow, 20 people from Germany will visit our school. They are university students studying for their BA in Deaf Education. It should be interesting.

I will write more soon. Meanwhile, let me hear from you.
Love you,
Becki

March 2, 2011
Becki,
After picking up my co-driver on February 20, we headed to Ellenwood, Georgia, took general freight to Portland, Oregon, Yakima, WA., and Wenatchee, Washington, then delivered to Monroe, Georgia, and then to Montana.

The temperature was -15 degrees Fahrenheit. It became colder until it was below 26 degrees Fahrenheit. We put extra additives in and drove as fast as we could go, outrunning a storm going Northeast. Then we did the same, going back to Monroe, Georgia. When we arrived in Monroe, it was 65 degrees Fahrenheit. I put on short cutoffs and enjoyed the warm air, took a walk, and went to two church services.

I paid another month on the phone, and the last check was small. The first two days were slow after picking up my co-driver. Sorry, the previous check was small because of much sitting and delivering short loads.

I still carry a bicycle in the back of the cab, but don’t ride it much because I find walking better than riding a bike.

This new trip is from Monroe, Georgia, to Bessemer, Alabama, then to Blythe, California. I stopped in Sweetwater, Texas, to fix seven lights on the truck. My co-driver is now driving.

While sitting in the passenger seat, a jet was flying beside us. It was a C-130 Hercules Turbojet, called “Air Born Daddy” because it can be used for almost everything, for short runways, dirt runways, and heavy loads. Most jets would suck up dirt in their engines before taking off, but this is a propeller. Jet props are high, so as not to pick up dust in the machine. The next trip is to Colton, California, to Henderson, North Carolina.

Did you tell that woman, Marsha, what I told you to tell her?

You are a stream of bottomless, slow-moving water running over the rocks, singing in the desert: devoted, careful, with a goal in mind, and all people are your friends. I love you so much.

Neal

March 8, 2011
Becki,
We are out of time. My co-driver and I are at the edge of our Logbook and must stop after 5 or 6 hours. The paycheck should be good next week.
We came from California to Abilene, Texas, and went to Alabama.
I love you,
Neal

March 9, 2011
Neal,
LeaMcD’s account is in the red. I am trying to juggle our budget here. Rent has not been paid for four months. I paid only half of the salaries last week.

Wondwossen and I pray for you to keep up your strength and spirit and for God to supply the needs for our budget.

We pray about it when we are in the red and then ask Wendy to check our P.O. Box!

The report I did for Covenant never got to them. I am so discouraged about what Mesfin did to us. It makes me feel that we don’t we deserve Covenant to help us.

When people are playing games with us, I don’t want to ask for money. I hoped and prayed Covenant might support us again, and yes, it is true! They will do it again. Wow, an answer to prayer. GOD is good! Everything is looking better.

Things are falling into place. People are coming to help us. The Ministry of Education is one hundred percent behind us. I am going to USAID next week to ask for funding. Chances are good; we will get it. We will launch an essential program for deaf students and Deaf teachers, which will affect the whole country.

Many people are supportive of LeaMcD. But all the other Deaf Schools continue to leave us out of their joint activities. The Church of Christ found funds to begin Sign Language training with all the parents of all the Deaf schools. They cooperate with all the deaf schools, but they left us out. Weird.

Fortunately, God never left us out and gave us the help we needed. IT IS SO GREAT TO TRUST GOD!

Okay, our ship is nearing the port. I wonder what other things God will send us. In the coming days, I want to tell you, keep up your faith, your love, my love. I love you so much.
Becki

March 13, 2011
Becki,
Why do we do what we do? You put yourself in harm’s way. We are separated on opposite sides of the world, but plugging away, doing what we need not do. The question is, why?

My team partner and I are going as fast as this truck will go. I’m hearing rattles and vibrations and can’t sleep. I feel better driving than not, but my co-driver wants to drive now.

Nothing is in the bank, a car full of mold parked somewhere in another state, and no house to go to of my own. My break will end this month. That is three months in this truck.

Two weeks ago, there was no money in our account, and one week ago, about $49.00. For the last four or five days, I’ve been living only on the coins in my pocket. Today I walked to a Bank of America and took 100 dollars out.

Why is doing the right thing so costly? I didn’t realize that walking down Hagey Lane, I would meet you, and I would love you so much. It would cost so much, and I would learn so much. But when our ship comes, we understand the ship is ours. We will not hesitate because we get what we are searching. We will be content even though it may be smaller than we expected. If bigger, that’s okay too. But it will be enough. If our life is short while we work and wait, then when our life has ended, I will be satisfied.

Living by faith for what I don’t hold in my hands is beautiful. The issue is something I cannot buy with money and costs everything. You might say something like “the pearl of great price” that a man, when finding it, sold all he had and bought.

A song I listened to on Pandora, I dedicate to you, called “A Little Falls of Rain. This song always makes me cry. It fits so well, and other songs are called “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” and “You Must Love Me.” I haven’t memorized all the words, but they are true. They are you and me.
I love you.
Neal

March 14, 2011
Hi Neal,
I only read what you wrote once, but I will read again several times today. I wanted to answer you right away because what you said is touching and correct. We are in a unique position of God’s grace. This one has cost us everything, like buying the pearl of great price, but wow, if we only realized half of what that pearl is about!

For example, the Ministry of Education is so supportive of our new proposal that we plan to work side-by-side. In addition, the right people are coming along to work with us on putting the project proposal together….one is the former Vice Minister of Education, Dr. Teklehaimanot. The other is Pawlos, an educated deaf man, whose heart is good. Nigeria has been his home for the past 15 years, but he is here now. He is the only deaf man in the country with an MA degree in Deaf Education. His desire is not to be an educator but a pastor to the deaf. I always say with caution about anyone from Ethiopia, since our track record of finding good people to work with us isn’t so good, but we must continue our faith. We are learning valuable lessons through the school of hard knocks.

God will bring the right people to do the right thing and increase His work one hundredfold. It seems this is the time and place for all to happen.

Everything is moving so fast. Everyone wants to finish the new proposal and start it next school year. Two key people are coming this afternoon.

An appointment will be arranged with USAID sometime next week. I will write more about this incredible turn of events later.

Meanwhile, God is using you and Covenant to keep us afloat until the ship is unloaded and in the right hands. This thing is already coming to the harbor, almost at the dock!
Love you lots,
Becki

March 20, 2011
Becki,
What churches burned down? My co-driver told me the news that 48 churches had burned down in Ethiopia. Please send a note and tell me you are all right. If they do that, they deserve nothing we can do to help.

Imagining them searching for the truth is gone. We might as well pull out and let Ethiopians keep their insanity and not help expand it. It is willful ignorance, insane, and selfish. Those who tell lies follow the father of lies, Satan, and imitate him. Please tell me it’s not all not true. Tell me a good reason to be in Ethiopia.
Love,
Neal

March 21, 2011
Hi Neal,
Please do not panic. Muslims burned the churches in another area of Ethiopia. Nothing new; Muslims always do that kind of thing worldwide.

So many great things are happening here. Wondwossen and I continue to pray daily. We are seeing so many answers to prayers; we also await the day God will get you out from under your burden and bring you here to be with us.

Our school now has the favor of the Ministry of Education. They endorse all we do, praise everyone, and cooperate with us on everything. We are also partnering with a government teacher training college to start our Deaf Teacher training next year.

An American woman is working in the Special Needs Department, and I will ask her to be on our board. We plan to resubmit a project proposal to USAID this week and will continue proposing to get funding from somewhere. God will do it.

We are also preparing for kindergarten through 4 and grade 11 next year. The manager from the Saluta Flower Farm (the place you visited) has agreed to fence our playground with encouragement from the railway station. In every direction, things are improving.

I’ll tell you more good news next time. Until then, keep your eyes on God because He is doing great things.
Love you, my love,
Becki

March 25, 2011
Becki,
The week of April 2 to April 8, I applied for time off. I was hoping to get a much-needed rest.

Today I called Wendy. Kent has been sick with something like the flu. It should be over by the time I arrive.

I got two boxes of Gala apples from Yakima, Washington, today at 2:00. One will go to the Wildwood church; the other to Wendy, or the one to the church will go to a charity yard instead.

An oil change is due on the truck, plus a cracked windshield, so we will soon be at the Chattanooga yard.

How many students are in the school? When is the school year finished? What grades is the school teaching now? What grades are you preparing to teach next year?
Love,
Neal

March 25, 2011
Hi Neal,
I am so happy you will take a rest. You deserve a rest. I wish the rest could be here with us. Wondwossen and I continue to pray for you each day. Also, the staff who go to our prayer meeting pray for you every morning.

There are 57 students in grades 5-10. While in the States, Mesfin told me a lie, saying we had 90 in the school.

The Church of Christ continues to do dirty work on the students’ minds, so we did not get as many students as we should have. We are getting ready to expand our services to the deaf next year by having grades 1-12. We will partner with Kotebe Teacher Training College, and an online program that wants to work with us called Flavel University.

I will present USAID with the project proposal for this entire program in a few days. I am waiting for Pawlos, the deaf man, to finish the proposal for us.

If you check LeaMcD on Facebook, you can view photos and a few notes about our school. We are getting ready to advertise more about our school on Facebook and do a web page again. Not only that, but we are working with a couple of people wanting to promote LeaMcD and the students on TV. One is a TV producer and the other is a fashion designer.

The fashion designer has sent us a modeling trainer. He has been training 18 of our 9th and 10th graders to model. We laid down all the rules about the dress code and music, too, which is an excellent, clean approach to the art of modeling.

In a couple of months, they will be on TV as an excellent promotion of our school.
We will also use the opportunity to recruit other students through this means.

The school year is over in June. The teachers are working hard to prepare the 8th and 10th-grade students for the national exams.

The Ministry of Education loves what we are doing and wants to support us as much as they can. They recognize us as the key that unlocks the door for deaf education because we have quality deaf education and are preparing to start a teacher training school.

All the other schools compete with us, trying to show that they are better. Good to get this competition, since it will improve the lives of the deaf in Addis. Also, the railway station is getting behind with our work, even though the rent for the last 4 months is unpaid. Instead of paying rent last month, we used the money that Covenant sent us to get some lab equipment that the Sub-city demanded of us. We also bought two computers.

I must pay the deaf man, Pawlos, who is doing the project proposal a lot of money because, from this proposal, we can find the funding. Hopefully, we can solve your financial burden at the same time. So, the railway station has not received its rent yet. They might give us a waiver, considering our work is for the benefit of the government.

I will send you more recent photos of our school while you are resting. I will send the project proposal and other reports so you can print them out at Wendy’s house, so people know what we are doing.

Meanwhile, a severe blow came from our enemies, Ejigu, Wolde Michael, Abebe, and Workiye, in the court. Mesfin made a lie to tell the judge the last time, upon my return to Ethiopia. I was forced against my will to speak the same lie or put Wondwossen and Demeke in prison, since they also testified to the lie. It is bringing another big headache, the same kind I experienced two and a half years earlier with the principal, Molla, and the two female teachers when I left the States last time. I was even more prepared for this time. I will try to explain more next time. I love you.

Thank you so much for all you do.
Love you,
Becki

March 25, 2011
Becki,
How many total students are in all grades now?
Neal

March 25, 2011
Neal,
I discovered we have 54 students, not 57.
Grade 5=3 students
Grade 6= 10 students
Grade 7=10 students
Grade 8=9 students
Grade 9=10 students
Grade 10=12 students.
The Deaf Education rule is for 15 students in each class. I will try to send you pictures via AOL. But do not send emails through AOL, since it is a headache most of the time.
Love you,
Becki

March 29, 2011
Hi Neal,
Wendy told me of the Best Buy bill for $99.00, which I planned to pay online only. They require a password I set up, but it isn’t easy to do here. Since you will take a break, could you also take care of this insurance bill, which is 9.00 a month, or something like that?

Why don’t you buy a cheap phone or find an old one somewhere for your insurance on your phone? I can’t call them without paying outrageous money since Magic jack does not work here. Also, I don’t have access to the other as before. Please check on it when you get to Chattanooga during your home leave. Please do not forget to finish the taxes, too. Thanks.

I love you very much. Everything is going well here. We have started our fundraising again and hope to get somewhere this time. Pray, this year, our ship will come in.
Becki

April 5, 2011
Becki,
I need to read you part of a paragraph I studied in a book. The eye of God looking down the ages was fixed upon the crisis His people are to meet when earthly powers shall be arrayed against them. As the captives in exile, they fear death by starvation or violence. But the Holy One who divided the Red Sea on behalf of Israel will manifest His mighty power and turn around their captivity.

They shall be mine, says the Lord of Hosts. On that day, when I make up my jewels, I will spare them as a man spared his son who serves with him. Malakai 3:17. If the blood of Christ’s faithful witnesses were shed, it would not be like the blood of martyrs whose seed sown for you at harvest for God. Their fidelity would not be a testimony to convince others of the truth because the obstinate heart has beaten back the waves of mercy until they never return.

If the righteous were now left to fall prey to their enemies, it would be a triumph for the Prince of Darkness. Psalms 27:5, In the time of trouble, He shall hide me in His pavilion: in the secret of His tabernacle shall He hide me.

Christ has spoken in Isaiah 26:20, 21: Come, my people. Enter my chambers and shut the door behind you. Hide for a moment until the indignation is over. For behold, He comes out of His place to punish the earth’s inhabitants for their iniquity.

I know it’s coming. I heard yesterday the preacher on TV, Huckabee, the one running for president two years ago, expounding upon the four horses of Revelation, the four spirits of heaven. Revelation 6:1-8: White, Red, Black, and Beige. He said, the red horse is Communism. The black horse is Capitalism or Trade Commerce. You know, like “in the black.” The white horse is the Catholic Church, and the Popemobile is white. The jet the pope flies in is white. He did not mention the beige or spotted horse, but it makes sense. The beige horse must be a mixture of the two horses. I do not recognize which two, but I don’t read a mix of red and white come to beige. You know the black is a big put-down.

Capitalism is a pond of evil representing the world. So, it appears like Communism and a Catholic world mean the last horse of the apocalypse, white and red mixed. Little bits of information, be it right or wrong. I don’t know, but it excites me.
Love,
Neal

April 6, 2011
Neal,
You sent me some interesting reading. I know something important is happening in the world. The writer seems to understand it well. Thanks for sharing.

I hope you are doing well. You need to be ready to be here to get your blessing and be a different blessing to the deaf, rather than sacrificing all you financially have by sitting in a truck-going places all day. We are all expecting the time for you to be here. Our ship is near us now.
Love you,
Becki.

April 12, 2011
Hi Neal,
Are you on the road again? How is your mouth? I am sorry that you are having oral surgery, but you did well.

Interesting stuff you have been reading. For sure, amazing and scary things are yet to come. God promised it.

I love you, Neal. Still, I’m praying for you every day and looking for when we will be together again. Lots of things are going on here. I have been trying to send you pictures, but I have a problem with the email. I will keep trying.

Megena is an Indian girl volunteering at our school. She is leaving for the States tonight. I gave her a DVD of our school. She will send it to Covenant Transport. I hope you can also see it.
Love,
Becki

April 16, 2011
Hey Neal,
The girl volunteering here with us has gone back to the States. She is helping Mengesha get the books from Kidane and send them to Ethiopia. Did I tell you that Mengesha has taken my important history documents to his house in Pennsylvania? I thought they had been destroyed, but God made sure they were preserved. Amazing! We will get all the books to Ethiopia someday, including all my history documents.

Our new lawyer came yesterday to show me the paper that the court has sided with our enemies again, and we must pay 55,000 birr. It is horrible, but I am not concerned. The lawyer will appeal, and if we lose again, I will refuse to pay it. If I pay for it, the court cases will never stop. Everyone will know they can sue us and get money. So, I have been gearing up for the possibility of prison again.

I have been studying the blood of the missionaries. Sometimes, God fulfills His purpose to reach people for Christ by bringing havoc to His missionaries. I know that our calling here in Ethiopia is affecting people’s lives. I know our calling is for others, not only the Deaf community.

This place is an evil and corrupt country, but I am sure God wants to wake people up to their corruption and bring them to repentance. I am gaining spiritual strength day by day. I don’t know how God will use me in prison or anything else, but I know He will prepare me.

The success of LeaMcD is a testimony to God’s grace. It is unbelievable, Neal. You would be amazed at what God has done through your sacrifice.

My leg and one foot always give me a hard time, and I am in pain. I have tried to find an acupuncturist here, but so far, not yet. I sometimes go for a massage, which helps, but sometimes makes it worse. Maybe this means no more trucking for me!

I am still working on the website. It will be nice. We are passing out project proposals to all the NGOs here. Maybe I should send one to Covenant?
Love you lots,
Becki

April 16, 2011
Becki,
The problem with your leg is a pinched nerve because your vertebrae wear down with time. We all get shorter as we get older. Between two vertebrae, your nerves are pinched. There is an operation you can get in the USA. They cut a little slot in your bone for the nerve to sit; then the nerve will not pinch.

When you come to the States again, go to a doctor and see if he can do that. If he can, you will be a new person again. Not only could you drive a truck, but you could also do everything better. I have known about this for years, but was not sure you had that. My brother had that surgery done, and other people, too. It is an ordinary operation. The Chiropractor may not tell you about it here because they want you to come to them again and again.
I love you,
Neal

April 18, 2011
Becki,
Our lawyer, Steven Duggins, called me. He was returning my call from when I was at Wendy’s house. He said there is a deadline of May 15 for LeaMcD filing. So, I thought I would give you a heads-up to get all your taxes and bank statements in order.

I asked him how LeaMcD was doing. He said it is not in good condition, but it is still a 5013c. We need to get our papers in order.

Are you taking funds from our account and putting them in the LeaMcD account in Ethiopia? That is the only way I can understand our banking. That is the way Steven Duggins wants us to do it.

We are now sitting in Alabama, waiting to deliver this load to Walmart.
I like this Droid phone. I listen to talk shows all day and all night. Sometimes I set it to the choice of my co-driver to listen to. It’s all for only 39 dollars a month. I have never wanted to go back to using the old BlackBerry. It’s now an antique. What I did a week ago will save us about 100 dollars per month in two months. I’m thrilled.

I feel lazy, fat, and tired. But it’s cooler, and the sun is about down. I will do walking, pushups, and so forth to get my heart rate up for about 30 minutes.
I love you,
Neal

April 19, 2011
Becki,
Matthew Chapter 7 is a Bible text I can’t ignore. It is both judgment and mercy. Where we are striving to go, we lack understanding, so we fail.

Every day, I want to honk the horn at drivers and people strolling on the wrong side of the walkway. To imagine my attitude to be bad is unthinkable. God knows we are walking on the wrong side of things, wanting Him to overlook it. But we continue to condemn others while our path is filled with thoughts that are not of God.

So we are in turmoil, or don’t belong to God, and are left to our delusions. I want no part of these delusions. Please pray that I do the right thing in the most demanding circumstances.

This evening, I walked for three hours until the sun went down and returned to the truck a little after dark.

It was hot, but now it is cool. I am wearing an old jacket. It’s torn and bedraggled from catching on the side of a trailer, but it is warm and comfortable.

How are you doing over there? For every friend, you have an enemy. Also, people who first claim to be your friend, betray you.

Here is what I think about your court case penalty. When the government asked the disciples of Jesus to pay taxes, He sent them down to get a fish from the water. They got a coin. Then Jesus said, Pay the taxes. Jesus also said to give Caesar the things that are Caesar’s and to God the things that belong to God.

Do what the experts tell you to do. Pay what the government demands. God will provide for the person to pay taxes (the fish). Not meaning a man is a fish. But God delivers to a worldly government in earthly ways.

Oh, how I want God to bless me, and I hope I am not presumptuous. I want to do what is impossible to do by a man. That would be to do His will and not my own. To see what others cannot see; to do what others cannot do because God will bring the fish and fulfill that which man alone cannot understand.

The end is near, but most cannot see this. If they can, they do not know what to do or have the power to change anything. But I want to be on edge and misunderstood by the majority. I expect God’s will to be done. Where there is a prophecy written in the Bible, and no one understands it, I want to understand it.

My most beautiful dream is at the end of time, walking around, talking to many people, not knowing what is happening. Sin has no power. Death has no control over me because I have a seal, so there would be no point in my dying. It’s finished. A little time passes before everyone is aware.

I love you. My battery is dead, and I am walking again because I can’t sleep. After all, I’m used to driving at night. I’m writing to you again after charging the battery.
Love, love, love,
Neal

April 25, 2011
Hey Neal,
I transferred $1700.00 into our LeaMcD account because I planned to pay the staff in a few days. Moving it back to our account is something I hate to do because of how it looks, but I can do it. When Wendy puts in Covenant’s money, I can pay instead and know at least $600.00 in our personal account. Let me know what you want me to do. I was wondering how it happened. We got so much money in our account this time. You might call Wendy and ask her if she has our tax return check and check from Covenant.

We may get help from “Save the Children USA” and seven other Save the Children organizations from other countries. I will let you know how it is developing. God is moving, and our ship is coming.

Becki

April 28, 2011
Neal,
Where are you? Are you ok? Were you around the tornadoes? Let me know if you are ok.
I love you,
Becki

April 29, 2011
Becki,
We are in Livermore, California. We came through Tennessee on I-81 and I-40. My co-driver drove from Virginia, on I-81, then west on I-40 to Knoxville, TN. It was cloudy with rain. Then I drove from Nashville, Tennessee, to Little Rock, Arkansas. It was windy and pouring down rain all the way. Thunder and lightning were also severe. That was the front of the storm.

We are ok. Wendy called me, and she said Chattanooga was a mess. The tornado changed direction before it got to her neighborhood. The same tornado almost took out Covenant Transport.

After unloading here at Livermore, California, we will pick up at Salinas, California, then deliver at Opelika, Alabama.

We were at French Camp last night because we had a high-security load. While I was there, I found a man new to truck driving. He needed a little help with his logbook, so I went to help him with his broken-down, wrecked truck. Sometimes, it would take 45 seconds of stuttering to get his point across. I helped him for about 1 hour with his logs and gave him my old map. He didn’t even have a flashlight. His trainer did not tell him to keep his old logbooks with him, so bringing him up to date on his logs was complex. I feel sorry for him because he has so much to learn. But in another way, he is the perfect person to drive a truck because what he learns, he will practice. If he sticks with it, he will be a better driver than an educated person because he will be serious about his job.
Love,
Neal

May 9, 2011
Hi Neal,
How are you doing? Peter called last night to wish me a Happy Mother’s Day. That was nice. He must return to Detroit for a couple of weeks and resign. Meanwhile, he is taking care of Caden. He sent pictures of Caden. Caden is growing. I see Peter and Carolyn on his little face.

We are still waiting for USAID and Save the Children to share their thoughts. It is a waiting game now. I hope you are doing fine.
I love you.
Becki

May 9, 2011
Neal,
Our lawyer needs to know the total contributions filed on our tax return. I need this info by Wednesday, or call and give him the information by Wednesday. Let me know soon.
Love you!
Becki

May 11, 2011
Becki,
This evening, I ate at the Golden Corral. It had been 2 or 3 weeks since I had eaten good food, so when we arrived at the delivery point, my co-driver and I filled up. I feel guilty spending $11 to eat when our entire staff could feed on that amount.

We parked at Walmart, waiting for the unloading time tomorrow at 6:00 am. I found a whole shopping cart full of clothes in the parking lot. There are a lot of shirts; some still have the price tag.

Please let me know that you love and need me. It’s Mother’s Day, and you will most likely feel worse than I do.

Matthew 7:1 is still the verse from the Bible that affects me.

I miss you. I love you. I need you. That makes me very blessed. “You are standing there loving me whether you should, so somewhere in my past or childhood, I must have done something good.” (Sound of Music)
I love you,
Neal

May 11, 2011
Neal,
Thank you, Neal, for the info about the taxes. I will also send him a message about what we claimed, $26,000

Yes, I love you so much. It is the same as always because we are doing God’s work. Nothing changes. I love and respect you; you cannot imagine. Who can equal you? I am tired of your not being here with me and with us. Everyone here feels the same. It is nothing new for me to say to you, but you need to know I need you the same as ever. Who else has been on the same path with me all these years and stuck it out? Who cares for me the same as you? Who understands and knows my heart the same as you? Who else can I trust the same as you? We have been down a long, long road together. Nothing and no one can change that, so I would rather always be alone than even consider for a moment any other.

Please do not feel guilty for enjoying a meal when you want. You must eat well for your health. I do the same as you when I eat something other than injera. Now that Covenant is back, helping us. I sometimes go to Wim’s and order soup or a salad, but not the expensive meals. I keep trying to get our cooks to buy fresh food for me, but it has not worked so far.

Anyway, I am saying to eat good food and eat as much as you want at the buffets. Please take care of yourself and do not feel guilty. It would be best if you found good things, not only for the people here. Your sacrifice is more than incomprehensible. When I brood over it, I want to cry and cry. Why continue and continue this way? When will God change things and let you have rest?

I love you with all my heart.
Yours forever,
Becki

May 13, 2011
Becki,
Harold Kemping believes the Lord is coming to rapture. HIS people. 6 pm. Oct. 21, 2011. Then, five months later, the end of the world will come. That’s ten days from now. Do you think he is wrong? It is a straightforward decision. I know it is close, but there are still too many things to be done for next week, next month, or next year. But it is getting close enough, time is moving fast, and it will be upon us sooner than we think.

God is blessing His own and will bring His will and warnings to completion.
Love,
Neal

May 14, 2011
Neal,
Yes, Kemping is wrong. But I have been keeping an ear open for Dec 21, 2012, as this has been a prediction for centuries.

I received a letter of rejection yesterday from USAID regarding our project proposal. But I am not discouraged. Something will open up to us sometime, and it will be the right thing.

I bought five much-needed computers for our deaf students last week. Conclusion: This was necessary and amazing that we could do it with money.
I am overwhelmed by God’s provision for us and how much we accomplish. Did I tell you we are partnering with a fashion designer to teach some of our students modeling? Also, a TV producer is featuring our school in about a month. Have you seen our website? Let me know what you think of it.
I love you so much.
Becki

May 16, 2011
Becki,
Well, I’m lonely, so I will write to you. I’m at Opelika, Alabama, ready to deliver a reefer load at Walmart. I’m walking around here and not sleepy yet. It’s about 10:30 or 11:00. The guard outside Walmart wants to talk again when I leave the store, but I don’t want to speak to him.

On Sunday, I went to a Baptist church about a half mile away. I had an excellent talk with the minister for about 10 minutes. He has never heard of Harold Kemping and believes, like me, that it is possible to lose your salvation. It is not an Independent, King James-only church, but he uses the King James for himself.

We will deliver at about 4:15 am tomorrow. I put the phone on automatic payment. The payments will be from the third to the sixth of each month. I must pay the card next month, so the automation will kick in.

It has been two years now since I got back to the United States from Ethiopia. I had to renew my medical card for the D.O.T. two years ago after returning from Ethiopia, so I had to go to the D.O.T. before they let me return to work.

If you cannot return to truck driving, you must come to the States, see the doctor, and take early retirement. He can tell you if he can fix your foot. Either way, you are doing the wrong thing right now.

I will talk to the guard for a few minutes again.
Love,
Neal.

May 16, 2011
Neal,
That is interesting about early retirement. If I get a chance, I will check it out. It is hard to get away from here; something always happens. But what you said makes sense. Some days are better than others regarding my foot/leg, etc., but my foot is always dead. It is my right foot, which I would use to put on the gas or the brake. I am not sure I can even drive a regular car, much less a truck. I have given up the idea that it will ever get well, but maybe they can do something in the States.

All the teachers and students are gearing up for the national exams in June. We hope to achieve excellent results.
Love you much!!!
Becki

May 17, 2011
Becki,
Well, it was your left leg hurting last time, remember? I am eager to get you back to get it all figured out. Maybe I can have you back here for 2 or 3 weeks, and I wish for longer.
Love,
Neal

May 17, 2011
Neal,
Yes, my left leg was in terrible shape in America, too, because the sciatic problems jumped around all over my hips and legs. It was the same issue when I returned to Ethiopia, but something worse happened. My right leg seized up. I couldn’t walk or move without horrible pain. A Sports Doctor worked on it until I could walk again, but my right foot never recovered and is always numb. Still, the problem with my hips and legs sometimes pops up. It comes and goes, but my foot is always dead.

I can’t get away to the States yet. The court case continues with Abebe, Ejigu, and Wolde Michael trying to steal money. I will refuse to pay. A quick trip back to the States might be possible if the court case concludes soon or is delayed until after school, but summer airline tickets cost more.
Love you,
Becki

May 24, 2011
Neal,
Where are you? Are you safe? There was a horrible tornado in Joplin, Missouri. I am checking to see if you were anywhere near it. I love you!
Becki

May 24, 2011
Becki,
No, I am not in Joplin, Missouri. But I have seen plenty of devastation in New York, Alabama, Tennessee, and North Carolina. The one in Joplin was six miles wide. I don’t know how many miles long. I heard it destroyed the hospital. X-rays 60 miles from where they were stored.
Neal

May 25, 2011
Neal,
Wow, this has been a challenging year in America for some states with so many tornadoes. I’m glad you are safe.
Sorry for Harold Camping and those who followed his teachings about May 21. It must be difficult for them since they were sure life on Earth was over, and they did many things to prepare for it. I have been trying to read about it online. People are mocking, but as you said, people will still mock when the real thing comes. It is all sad.
Love,
Becki

May 25, 2011
Becki,
Everyone is laughing at Harold Kemping. But I am not. It is all fascinating. They will laugh at me or you one day, but there will be no laughing in the end.
It will be great to look back at sad times. I will barely remember because of all the beautiful things to be discovered that God has prepared for you and me.

I am sitting, waiting for a load at Henderson, North Carolina. It is about 90 degrees here. I will send this to you and then read your email.
Love,
Neal

June 6, 2011
Neal,
How are you? I need to hear from you. I have another court date this morning. Our lawyer appealed the last court decision, telling the judge I should not pay 55 thousand birr to Abebe. This morning, we will discover if accepted. If not, I might go to prison if I don’t deliver. But, if pushed, I will not pay. Everyone knows he is trying to steal money from us. Did I tell you he made a surprise visit to our school with a police officer last weekend and wanted to imprison me?

I am facing evil again, but have plenty of good people to help me now. It differs from before. I am trying to get to the States for a short time and get my leg and foot checked, as you said I should. Please tell me how you are doing. I love you.
Becki

June 6, 2011
Becki,
Abebe lost my confidence long ago because he became angry at the cab driver who took us all to the Hot Springs. The driver refused to take him home after Abebe argued with him, remember?

Most evil people think the same way when it’s election time. They pledge to be conservative and claim to do it for the children. Then, when in office, they say, “What is mine is mine, and what is yours is mine.” That’s who Abebe is, too.

Are you sure this is the right time to stay in Ethiopia? The sooner, the better for you to come back here. The decision is simple if the nerve damage isn’t too severe. If it is terrible, you need to document it soon.

Whatever you decide, go for it. Do what you must do. I love you and have great respect for people who honor you.

June 7, 2011
Neal
It is risky to travel to the United States right now. Many enemies are waiting for me to leave so they can snatch the school.

We are successful yet vulnerable because evil people in government get bribed or are convinced that I am a terrible person, so they want to hurt us, especially me. I am still praying about what I should do. People have told me several times I should not be out of the country for over 2 or 3 weeks. Also, I shouldn’t leave because the court cases might continue through the rainy season.

Even if I could travel to the States, paying for the airline ticket, my stay in the States, and doctor visits would be costly. But if God wants me to do it, He will lead the way.

I thought the court judgment was yesterday, but I misunderstood. It was about Abebe’s response to our appeal. I am unsure of his response because I have not talked to our lawyer yet. I will go to prison if the judge gives a guilty verdict again. It will be undeniable corruption, so maybe people will fight against injustice.

We are at the end of the school year. Our 8th graders have taken the national exams. They are happy because they all believe they have passed. Today and this week, the 10th graders take the national exams. It will be difficult for them because academics get more challenging for the deaf when they get into higher grades. But we are praying for good results.

Thanks so much for all your encouragement. I am so, so proud of you!!!!
I love you,
Becki

June 10, 2011
Becki,
I couldn’t sleep. So, I thought of something that had been on my mind for a long time. I think of it when I am lonely and sad. I think of it when I am happy, but mostly when low.

I wrote about myself, how selfish I was, my goals, and how I failed in my purposes. Time after time, the same thing happened: I forgot, failed again, and then failed again. I knew in my heart what I wanted. I knew what to do; I knew I was wrong, yet there was that going away from the actual reality with a leash on my soul, and I knew it. The only way I could get away from it was when I admitted I was wrong and gave it all to Jesus, my Savior, and I knew I could start fresh. He forgave me. So, I wrote all these good and bad things about myself and how God saves me when I fail. I wrote about how good it feels to give it all to Jesus, and that my problems do not belong to me anymore.

That changed my attitude, life, and approach to other people. I started a webpage called http://www.jesussaveme.com. I put it all in there and sent it out worldwide with such fantastic feedback. I couldn’t read all the responses. I spent most of my time reading and responding to other people’s emails and reading their answers. I had started something definite. Many people learned of the salvation of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, from the stories of others. As expected, many people scoffed.

So, I started a new life for myself, and a new life for many. It was the most needed website, becoming one of the most hated and loved. It became a part of history as Gutenberg started the first printing press to make the Bible, from Genesis to Revelation. This website became another way of revealing God’s will.
Love always,
Neal.

June 10, 2011
Hi Neal,
I love what you wrote. Your dream about a website sounds fantastic. I need Jesus, too. Sometimes, I am anxious because of our situation, and then I remember all the scriptures that say things like casting all your burdens on Jesus because He cares for you. It is true. The only thing in the world that brings peace to my troubled and lonely soul is Jesus. Like you, I fail and fall, especially in not trusting God. I need a lot of prayer.
Love,
Becki

June 11, 2011
Hey Neal,
I have been crying about you, especially since your last email. It touched me. I want you to know how much I am trying to get you out from under your burden beyond any doubt. I want you to be here so much. I pray God answers our prayers this year.

I am so proud of you. For whom you have become in the Lord, I love you so much. It has touched me and inspired me.
Love,
Becki

June 11, 2011
Becki,
I am so glad I sent you the last letter. I always want it to be me.
Today, at the end of my shift, I bought chicken gizzards: that is the last time I will eat them unless I am hungry or trying to impress someone.
To hear you are standing there loving me, whether you should, and listen to I am working here loving you.
Neal.

June 12, 2011
Becki,
So, how did the students do on their national exams? I want to know that we are not spinning our wheels and need to know we are spending our money correctly.
It is on June 10. We are going from Chattanooga to Nashville, then to San Leandro, California.

I talked to Peggy and Nick. I told them you plan to visit us long enough to get your medical issues documented and fixed.
Neal

June 12, 2011
Hi Neal,
We will not get the results of the national exams for one or two more months, but judging from the students, both the 10th and 8th grades are happy. They think they did well. Do not worry; we are not spinning our wheels with the school. It is so impressive. God is so good.

The staff are happy; the students are so glad, and we have great peace and success. Only outside enemies always try to find a loophole to destroy us, but it is not happening. We are getting ready for our rainy season programs.

I don’t know how to get to the States to care for my health issue. It could mean a financial disaster for us if I go now, and I still have court cases pending into July.

Some are still waiting to find an opportunity to hurt us, making me nervous about leaving, even for a brief time. However, I am open to it if the doors open. Let us pray about how God might do it.
Love,
Becki

June 16, 2011
Becki
I have been annoyed for some time with a stye near my eye. I scratched at it, rubbed it, squeezed it. Nothing took away the annoying feeling. Then, a week or two ago, I got some fingernail clippers, dipped them in alcohol, and cut them open on top, and nothing changed. It stayed the same, but now with a scab on top. Then, while driving two or three days later, I scratched it and felt a scab. So, I pushed it, pulled it a little, and it came off. I looked at it, and it was not just a scab: it was a scab with what looked like an onion bulb connected to it. It was ugly. The nasty pimple-looking thing, including the itch, is gone now. My eye looks and feels better. I looked in the mirror and couldn’t find it.

Ok, I’ll try not to tell you about the gory things. I can’t sleep but must drive at 2:00 am, in two and a half hours.

When we deliver tomorrow, we will pick it up at Bessemer, Alabama, and then to Kettleman City, California.
I will read it now. Maybe that will help me go to sleep.
Love,
Neal

June 16, 2011
Hi Neal,
It made me sick when I read about your eye. You are crazy to pick and pull on something near your eye. What were you thinking? Please take better care of yourself. I know your habits about burning, picking, and pulling things that pop up on your body!!!!!

I woke up this morning with my right eye hurting and watering. Then I realized I had forgotten to take out my contact lenses last night. So, I took it out this morning and used my glasses today to give my eye a rest. That is nothing compared to your actions on or around your eye!

I have been downloading and listening to many of Spurgeon’s sermons for the last several months. I am listening now to the “Heavenly Citizen sermon.” It’s encouraging since I do not feel at home here.

I will know about one of Abebe’s cases against me in a few days. It might send me to prison.

How is your co-driver, and do you have a good one this time? Are you getting along with him?

We had another sports award day last week at our school. Our students are excellent at sports and always beat out the other schools. We are still trying to fence the field. We have legal permission, but we must go through many headaches to do it. It will be great once completed. We hope to have a lot of activities inside the field, not only sports.

I am still seeking funding for all our programs. God knows how to do it. I am exhausted from looking at other NGOs to support us. They are so complicated. We disagree with deaf teaching in the same classroom as hearing students, so organizations are reluctant to support us. The government policy is inclusive. However, they believe in what we are doing, but cannot give us an endorsement letter to search for our funding.

Everything here is complicated and full of headaches. But God is with us every step of the way. Sometimes I cry about your plight because I know it is so hard on you. Be assured, I am trying on this side.
Love you so much,
Becki

June 17, 2011
Becki,
We picked up a load of lettuce from two shippers in Salinas, California. We are going to Brundidge, Alabama, on June 17.

The stye in my eye is gone now. I cannot even see where it was, and it doesn’t itch anymore.

Proverbs 26:13. The slothful man saith, there is a lion in the way; a lion is in the streets.

Are you and I like verse 17, or is it our enemies in verse 27 that will fall?

When I was in the 6th or 7th grade, I had to read one verse in Proverbs: I chose Proverbs 26:27. He that gives to the poor shall not lack, but he that hides his eyes shall have many a curse. (I wouldn’t say I like it, but it fits).

Proverbs 31: Who can find a virtuous woman such as you? You rise early to help the poor; your honor is your clothing. Your work is only wisdom, and your kindness shall be the law. There is none like you.

I am happy and most grateful to God for bringing us together, even during hard times.
I love you,
Neal

June 24, 2011
Neal,
Seeing the pictures makes me miss driving the truck with you. Tomorrow, we have Parents’ Day. I haven’t had to fret about it. I am so proud of our staff. Everyone is making it work. In times past, all of it would be on my shoulders, or at least I had to oversee everything, or nothing would work right. But those days are over. Everyone and everything we have had a hand in through God’s grace is maturing. You also should be so happy and proud to know that everyone and everything at the school is doing well. Your sacrifice is going a long way, and God blesses it.
I love you.
Becki

July 6, 2011
Hey Neal,
How are you? We are all doing fine here. I had to do a new filling in my tooth at the same place where you went. It was cheap enough. Cheaper than in the States.

School is out now, and we are gearing up for the rainy season programs.

Did I tell you about the fashion designer collaborating with us and some of our older students learning to model? Also, now they design their clothes and learn how to sew. It is a great program. Sometimes they will be on cable TV. I miss you.
Love you lots,
Becki

July 16, 2011
Hi Neal,
I am checking to see if you are ok. What is happening? People from Atlanta are visiting here. He is an audiologist, and she is a Special Needs teacher. I gave them your phone number ……6034. Is this number correct, or is it another number to give them when they return to the States? They can call you and tell you about the workshop they did at our school and our visit. I hope they can somehow be a part of our work.

What is happening there?
I got an email from Eugene.
He said he heard you were in Chattanooga and wanted to see you, but it was too late. I love you so much.

When is this going to stop, and will you be here with us?
Love,
Becki

July 17, 2011
Becki,
Covenant changed to a new computer program. Without a computer, we cannot tell how many trips we get paid for and how much on each. Drivers are upset without computers.

I called last week and asked how much my pay was for each trip, and they said (with this new program, we can’t tell). It is frustrating because I will make more mistakes when there are many changes, and be forced not to trust even people who may have goodwill toward me.
I love you,
Neal

July 22, 2011
Becki,
Next week, there should be a big check. We have been running our logbooks ragged for the last week and a half. The previous statement should have been significant, but Covenant dismantled its old accounting system for a new one. They pushed the pay period forward or backward for several days. I assume it ends on Wednesday instead of Monday.

We will all be behind for 4 or 5 days. We got only a small check on Thursday.
It makes my stomach upset, and I hate being on edge. A minor earthquake should not cause a large earthquake.
Love,
Neal

July 24, 2011
Becki,
He came to the USA to write this book in 1970, “The Year of Our Lord.” It is one of the most exciting books I have ever read.

I am reading about the history of religion in the United States and another book called “In His Steps.”
I love you,
Neal

July 25, 2011
Neal,
How are you? It is cold here. It rains every day. But I bet it is scorching in so many places where you are. I remember in the States, it was so hot last year this time.

The deaf students are involved in rainy season programs such as the library, computers, tutoring, sewing, fashion designing, and modeling. We are trying to start more programs as well.

What has been happening with Peter and Carolyn, and little Caden? I haven’t heard from Peter in a long time.
I love you!
Becki

August 2, 2011
Neal,
Over the weekend and last night, I cried a lot. I am feeling sorry for myself and your plight.

Grace returned from her work in Egypt and helped me think again in the right direction. I have a stronghold of negative thinking that might keep us from getting our blessings, and you being here. I desire God to change how I think.

Now for good news. You will be so happy to hear that KLM Airlines will help us!!!! Look up Wings of Support on the Internet. The pilots, co-pilots, and airline hostesses will give money and do projects with people like us.

They came to see our school last week and were impressed and committed to helping us. They said they wouldn’t stop once they started, even buying land for us. Good news, huh? They know all about you, too, so we will find answers. Also, other funding NGOs are planning to come and see our school next week, so we should get a response.
Love,
Becki

August 3, 2011
Becki,
These are some of my favorite books.
“In His Steps” by Charles Sheldon
“He is No Fool” by Elisabeth Elliot.
“For Such a Time as This,” Kayleigh McEnany

Sometimes, I listen to the song “Fiddler On The Roof.” He is praying as he sings. “Would it be possible in this incredible world, and with all your greatness, you could grant me a tiny fortune?”
Love you,
Neal

August 3, 2011
Neal,
You are reading good books, but I listen to a lot of sermons downloaded from the Internet.

I have been so down the past few days, so Grace gave me a book to read called “Tough Times Never Last, But Tough People Do.” When I saw that Robert Schuller wrote it, I gasped because he is so liberal. But I read parts of it and saw he has the right idea of being optimistic about good things happening. It is the correct way to live and think when you apply it to your life.

I realize, over the years of rejections, betrayals, and disappointments, that there are a lot of negative thoughts running around in my head. I need to renew my mind to overcome this destructive way of thinking. What a person thinks, so is he. I don’t even have a good testimony anymore because of my stinking thinking! I’m trying to fix this now. Unfortunately, bad habits die hard.

Did I tell you we are trying to retrieve the LeaMcD library books and documents kept in Kidane’s house? A deaf man, Mengesha, is helping us and has taken all my important documents to his house in PA for safekeeping. After all these years, we may still get the books sent to Ethiopia. Even if we don’t get the books but only the historical documents, I would be thrilled, but we are trying for everything.
I love you,
Becki

August 3, 2011
Becki,
I am reading a lot these days. One book is about a man who escaped from socialism in Russia. It took about 25 years to run from their political re-education camp for about 10 to 12 years, and they almost died. He swam for about 125 kilometers to an island when he escaped.

August 6, 2011
Neal,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!! Hard to believe you are now 61. I will write more soon. I love getting your emails. It is always the highlight of my day when I get an email from you.
I love you so much.
Becki

August 6, 2011
Becki,
Why are you so far away? It is not because you are on the other side of the world; I have been there before. I miss you a lot.

I read several more chapters in “IN HIS STEPS.” I know I belong in the same camp as Edward Norman (editor of the Daily News) or Rachel Winslow (the woman Singer), and so do you. We have a city we look at through prophetic eyes. We must keep our sanity because it gets darker each day. That city that man did not build.

That is encouraging; KLM Airlines might help us. I read about what they have done for other groups, with great compassion, love, and a feeling for others.

I am sitting in the truck at a Walmart store, ready to deliver tomorrow at 4:45 am in Brundidge, Alabama. After we deliver there, we will pick up another load to Opelika, Alabama.

I had an evening meal and then walked across the freeway to a fireworks store. I like Firecrackers. It is about $35.00 all hooked together, but it will be a long time till I can indulge myself with $35.00 for a reel that size.

I finished my walk, and it was time to slow down, set the alarm, and sleep for a few hours.

There is a mannequin sitting in a chair at this truck stop with a Bible open to Isaiah 53. He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering like one whom men hid their faces. — yet the Lord crushed him—Wow, too much for me. There’s nothing about which I can complain. I am nothing. I am unclean.
I love you.
Neal

August 10, 2011
Hi Neal,
Happy Anniversary! Do you know we have been married for 21 years? Amazing, huh? I wish we could celebrate together today. But know you are in my heart all day today.

I love your last email. Your character is so sweet, and God’s hand is on your life, protecting and comforting you. We pray for you every day. When I see God answering our prayers, I feel happy. You are always encouraging me with your words.

I have been feeling strange. Grace’s sister invited me to her family’s house in Debre Zeit. They were having a going-away party for someone and living in a beautiful place with a big yard, etc. The bed I slept in was triple king-size. I don’t have a bed in the office where I live. A narrow couch is where I sleep.

I couldn’t help thinking, what if we had not poured all our money into Ethiopia, where people are always stealing from us, etc.? I questioned myself: What are you and I doing in the world? I must face this because I have been experiencing depression. It is sometimes lonely and challenging, even though it is fantastic too.

I am so glad our reward and comfort need not be here in this life. How can we go wrong if we do what we are doing in the right spirit with God’s guidance? Is this so bad if we pour ourselves and our resources out for the hungry, poor, and hurting? Even if most people in Ethiopia seem so corrupt and selfish, are we wrong to do what we are doing in Jesus’ name?

I had a little taste of what we were missing by staying at Grace’s sister’s house. You and I do not follow the usual way of life and are committed to the end. It seems to everyone that we are fools. I wondered if I get sick or have Alzheimer’s, or if something happens to you, what will happen then?

We did this crazy thing to bless the deaf in Ethiopia. I pray God multiplies your sacrifice one thousand times more than what you have given. I pray everything you have done gives big glory to God and someday will touch many lives.
Neal, I love and appreciate you so much.
Love, Becki

August 11, 2011
Neal,
You will get a call from a lady named Sue this weekend. They were in Ethiopia. She is so sweet. She teaches disabled children in Atlanta. Sue and her husband, Vic, were in Ethiopia a few weeks ago. We did a project together. She can tell you all about it and our school. Anyway, answer your phone this weekend.
I love you!
Becki

August 18, 2011
Becki,
Somehow, it comforts me to know that you are looking at things from other people’s standpoints and looking at things from how I am looking at them or how your brothers and sisters may look at them.

While my co-driver is driving, I think of having a home with a shovel, lawnmower, or rototiller in my backyard, and you coming over to me saying; We have one more hour to be at someone’s house. Let’s get ready.

Last week, I tried to take $100.00 out. There wasn’t enough in our account. So, I’ve been trying to spend my bag full of pennies and quarters.

We are now waiting to deliver in front of a Walmart store. I will try to get $100.00 out again in a few minutes. Then I will walk about a half mile to Goodwill and see if they have a thimble. I want to sew the hems on the legs of two pairs of pants.
I love you,
Neal

August 28, 2011
Hello Neal,
More good news. Abebe lost the case against us! If you remember, the judgment was against us, and we would have to pay 55,000 birr to him. But our lawyer appealed, and we WON! Unbelievable. Now, I hope we are done with all the court cases. Had Abebe won, others, Ejigu, Mesfin, Wolde Michael, etc., would also have tried to take us to court. Now, I hope no one tries to sue us anymore!

Also, Abebe must pay for all the expenses, lawyer fees, etc. It could come to around 5,000.00 birr that he must pay us. It is not the amount he has stolen from us, but he must pay for his big evil and helping others to do wrong to us. I thank God for turning things around! Maybe we have turned a corner now that the thieves have had to stop in their tracks!
Love,
Becki

September 1, 2011
Becki,
I didn’t finish the last email I sent because I had to drive, but now I am stopped. I need to pay $231.00 to Verizon in 2 or 3 days, or they will turn my phone off.
The last two weeks have been challenging, and I made only a tiny amount of money.

We lost two loads in California. That was where our air conditioner went out. Then we traveled through 115-degree temperatures and sat in Los Angeles for half a day at Freightliner. They told us it would be two weeks for the part to arrive. So, we drove from Los Angeles to Chattanooga without air conditioning. We were in Chattanooga for a repair for two days, so the past three days have been spent doing short runs.

I was given a long run from Georgia to Los Angeles today. These six days will pay well because it takes four days to get there.
I got angry and edgy, not knowing what to do with my downtime yesterday. I had to wait 18 hours to deliver a load.

I dozed for most of the day and was surprised I could sleep that much. After resting, I walked from 9 pm until 10 pm, slept more, and got up at 4 am to deliver the load. The air conditioning was not running the whole time, and 115 degrees Fahrenheit inside the truck, with every window closed. Outside, it was 100 degrees Fahrenheit.

This phone is not acting right, so I can’t back up or delete messages. It is an unfamiliar experience for me. So, I will leave the mispronunciations as is. If my text says obscenity, that will be because the phone interpreted it that way, and I can’t erase it. How do I delete the foul language the phone sometimes types out when doing voice-to-text?
I love you,
Neal,

September 7, 2011
Neal,
I liked the picture of the Joshua tree so much I put it on my desktop and view it whenever I open my laptop. I love weird trees with personalities and open spaces, such as deserts, instead of forests.

We had the Modeling demonstration program today. Everyone said it was a good job. The TV people came to film it, saying they would put it on TV, maybe this Sunday.

I have not got the pictures out of the camera yet, but when I do, I might try to send them to you. I can’t figure out how to send images like you because my phone does not work the same unless I attach them.

It’s unbelievable that Wendy is 38 years old today, so I guess that means I am getting older!

Please look up the audiobook called “Rees Howells, The Intercessor.” You will like it because the guy has enormous faith and does strange things, the same as you and me.

I love the pictures you send me on your trips, so keep um coming.
I love you,
Becki

September 12, 2011
Becki,
After dropping off my co-driver for his home break, we sit together at a Walmart shopping center in Opelika, Alabama. We made a delivery this morning at 6:45 am Central Time.

I was out of canned goods and had not been to a good grocery store for ten days. So I bought groceries today for $45.00 cash.

Driving at odd times is not comfortable for me. I planned to go to evening church tonight at a Baptist church, but took a nap instead.

Robert, my co-driver, had a minor accident and took a mudflap off a trailer. I told him that if he backed up here, I would help him so he won’t rip off a mudflap. He parked in another spot before I could get out of the truck, backed up, and pulled down the steel bar. It was too strong to bend back. He felt terrible because $500.00 is the penalty mark on his ten-year record.

I walked around the lot, found a few 2×4s, then pushed them against the bent frame and the ground and had him drive a few inches forward.

We put the steel bar in its original place. He was thrilled because now it was fixable. I told him to look under the mattress and get the spare mudflap. It was fixed and looked as good as new in a few more minutes.

Feeling so happy, Robert bought me dinner at Golden Corral, where we are now waiting for a load. You may think I am bragging. I guess I am, but I want to consider that I am worth keeping.

Sometimes I wonder if I have too many tools with me. You may agree, but this time, it paid off.

I daydream of you, a house, a car, and a backyard, and in the fall, watermelon, squash, tomatoes, and green beans with extra for drying to cook in the winter. In addition, I crave a hot tub, but that is optional.

These things are “wants” and may not always be my “needs.”
I have you with an inner beauty that is far better than I knew to ask for, and a good-looking lady you are, too.

You should hear the songs I listen to on this phone, but most I delete. The words may not be correct, but I sing what is on my mind and pretend you are singing too. I sing along with you, cry, wave my hands, shake my fist and sing in Sign Language. After that, I worship God while driving with truth, Spirit, and emotion.

One song goes this way: “They are illusions. They are not the solutions they promised to be. The answer was there all the time. I love you and hope you love me. Don’t cry for me, Argentina. I never left you. Throughout my hectic days, the mad existence, I kept my promise. Do not keep your distance. As for fortune and as for fame, I never invited them in.”

The way I interpret that song is because I believed in my friends and the world. But I never expected what would happen. Don’t cry for me; don’t keep your distance. So what fits is for you and me. — Don’t keep your distance. I love you. And you love me. Don’t cry for me.

I would love to bring a big sheet cake with the words “COVENANT TRANSPORT” across the top to the LeaMcD school. To you, where you are, and in Chattanooga.

Another song goes this way: “Will it be too much to ask you, God, if you will give me just a small fortune?” (Fiddler on the Roof).

It is Sunday evening, after midnight, and quiet here with a few cars and a hum of transformers for lights in the parking lot. I can’t sleep, so I am emailing you on the phone.

It’s 60 degrees Fahrenheit, and I’m wearing my new $8.00 shoes from Walmart with no arch support. One heel of the socks has worn out, so I will throw them away. I will throw the shoes away when my feet get wet because the bottoms have several holes.

When God fixes everything, there will be an end to evil. In the meantime, there is no place to go but down. The poor will become poorer, and rich people may become poor too. There will be a great depression; many thousands will die from starvation in the United States, and the rest of the world will follow.
My battery is dying.
I love you,
Neal

September 14, 2011
Hi Neal,
Sometimes it can be so difficult, such as a few weeks ago. Covenant did not put in the total amount for two or three weeks. They have not made up for it yet. We will not pay rent until our renovation is complete. Mesfin did not build the classrooms correctly, so we had to redo them. The students and teachers complained that the classrooms were too hot, so we raised the roof, which is much nicer now.

You are a big hero for fixing other people’s problems with truck issues. So, what you did to fix the mudflaps does not surprise me. Your co-driver is fortunate to have you. I know how blessed I am to have you!

I must listen to “Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina.” When you listen to music and think of me, I love that.

In an attachment, I sent you a picture of myself and a short video of our modeling students. Please tell me if you get it, especially the video. I want to send you more things to see what we are doing.

We are starting school next week, so students have been registering.
God is with us. I believe it with my whole heart.
I love you, love you, love you.
Becki

September 14, 2011
Becki,
Arizona has no phone service, so I can’t download the attachment. I will try to download it later. The circle on my phone keeps going round and round, the same as a dog chasing its tail.

Not that I didn’t get paid last week. I haven’t caught up on finances for two months now because they changed their computer system and did not respond to my questions, such as how much I get paid for each haul.

A lot of old-timers are leaving Covenant. I discovered many were trainers who could not get answers to the driver’s questions, and shipments went unpaid.

Next week should be better because I complained, so they sent me solo driving from Alabama to Louisiana. I am back now.
Did you receive the pictures?
Love,
Neal

September 14, 2011
Hi Neal,
Yes, I got your pictures, and they are beautiful, as usual. Do you want to make me dream of trucking again?

I’ve been struggling and dizzy for several days. Maybe I got water in my inner ear again. I am depressed, but I keep tossing it up to the Lord to ask Him to please hurry and answer our prayers. Same as you, I keep holding on. I question myself; am I doing something wrong? No, I have killed no one, cheated no one. I am still on the right path and always examine my heart to determine if I am the problem behind our lack of funds.

I watch the wicked, the terrible liars, and evil people prospering, people who hate, slander me, and throw me away, even though I love them so much. They don’t find punishment for their evil. Instead, they keep getting lots of funding they can spend on their projects, themselves, and a facade to hide their sin. I find evil in me when I gnash my teeth at them in jealousy, yet didn’t I pray for my enemies that God would bless them? So why shouldn’t I be happy with them? But about us, why?

Why are we always in the same condition? I continue to seek God; I have been faithful to Him, loyal to you, and always marching to a different drummer, unlike most people I meet. I can’t believe God has forsaken us, so I keep asking myself, is it me? Am I the wrong one and deserve no better than what is happening? What does it mean?

Then, I consider Abraham’s faith. It took many years before he saw God’s promise. I think of many other Biblical characters to gain strength and to comfort myself. It helps me to remember I am in it for the long haul, no matter where it takes me.

But it is too painful when I think of you. It is the most distressing and most inspiring.
I love you with all my heart.
Becki

September 22, 2011
Neal,
For your information, something outstanding is around the corner. Hold on to your hat; God is working!
Love you,
Becki

September 23, 2011
Becki,
What is around the corner, and why should I hold on to my hat?
Neal

September 23, 2011
Neal,
It’s 4:40 am. Ok, I didn’t want to tell you until it’s in hand, but someone has come along who knows how to get funds and materials and promised that in one week, we will have funds and the materials. It might happen tomorrow. Two vehicles with many needed materials will arrive at the compound tomorrow morning. Funds may come tomorrow.

So, I say, hold on to your hat! I will let you know when it happens. I will have half a salary from the funds of $1,000 USD, and the rest is supposed to go for the project proposal we gave them: early childhood development with deaf children.

Meaning, funding must go for that project, but also room to maneuver, so I hope you can make a trip here for extended periods, and it won’t affect us as it did last time. Seeing is believing, so I will send you an email when I see it in the morning. This recent development came right after sending you that sad letter last week. I had become so discouraged that I cried out to God. He must have heard me and sent the ship!!!
I love you,
Becki

September 30, 2011
Becki,
I love you.
We are sitting again, but I don’t want to complain, so I am afraid to write to you lest I complain.

I am lonely without you because you aren’t by my side. Did you find the song I quoted, “I kept my promise, don’t keep your distance?” (Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina)?

I worry about you. You will tell me if something is wrong, won’t you?
I wish I could sit beside you and listen to all your problems, cry with you, laugh with you, hold you, and then listen to you again and pray with you.
Love,
Neal

October 1, 2011
Neal,
Everything is fine. Don’t worry about me. I am developing a floor plan for the little cottage you and I will have next to my office. I am waiting for the man who found us the funds I told you about at this very moment. He is putting the funds in our account at the bank, and then he is coming here. So don’t worry about me (Argentina) because when I see our ship has arrived, I will send you an email to let you know. I am sure it is not a hoax, but waiting for his arrival now. Then we can plan for your visit, ok????
Love you much!
Becki

October 1, 2011
Neal,
I am still waiting for our ship to come into the bank today. I will let you know soon. You can thank God!
Love, Becki

October 1, 2011
Hi Neal,
I waited for the people to put the money in the bank all day. It was my fault. I gave them the correct account number, but the wrong branch. So they had to redo the letter that lets the bank deposit into our account. It was too late when they finished. They will deposit it on Monday.

The organization donating the money is JICA. It is Japanese. It was last-minute money. They would have had to send back to Japan today if they found no worthy candidate. If I told you how much it is, you would be amazed. It will be deposited three times, which is three times more than our budget in a year. USD 49,000 times three. The fantastic thing is happening in our 10th year of LeaMcD, almost when we started.

The guy who has helped with the above will bring the registration papers tomorrow in LeaMcD’s name for a school bus and a Mitsubishi for me. That’s not all. Many more materials are on the way. This organization is Canadian, partners in the Horn of Africa. God is now pouring out His blessings. What we have been sowing is reaping a large harvest.

I’m thinking about your making a trip here. What is your idea?
Love, Becki

Re: Cottage
Rebekah Payne
October 1, 2011
Neal
You didn’t tell me your idea.

October 1, 2011
Becki,
Please email again about planning the cottage where you want to live. I searched for it this morning, and now I can’t find it.
Love,
Neal

October 1, 2011
Neal,
Do you remember the LeaMcD school library? Now it is my office, and where I sleep on the green couch. Next to the office is where I want nothing because the window to my office is there. It is a large enough space to build a guest house.

That is what I am thinking. You can always go to the organic food processing place around the corner to do a garden. Their place is a mess, and I am sure they would love for you to garden there. There are other possibilities as well for our living. However, having a place in the compound would be cheap, and we could retire.
Love you,
Becki

October 1, 2011
Becki,
Covenant has started a health savings account for those on their insurance, which means we pay no tax for what we put in weekly. I started with $5.00. When I discovered it was good for dental insurance, I changed it to $50.00 a week. There is about $500.00 in the account now, and I have ordered a new card to pay off part of the last bill of about $700.00 we made 7-8 months ago.

I still need to pay about $100.00 to the oral surgery doctor. Do you remember Middletown, PA? My tooth broke off, and I am still waiting for a root canal.

Are you sending mail differently than you used to? I get your mail, read it, then reread it, and it’s gone.

We picked up a load at Estes, Ellenwood, Georgia, near Atlanta, Georgia. Now we are on our way to Dallas, Texas.

I am happy that your ship is to be in the harbor.
Neal

October 1, 2011
Neal,
Why do you say happy for me? It is especially happy for you since this means something different for you. Happy for us.

I hope you can fix your teeth and pay for it with your next check. From then on, we should try to pay off all our debts, get to a better financial place, and then you can come for a visit. Maybe January?

No. I have not been doing anything different from how I send emails. I hope no one is eavesdropping on our email because it’s weird that it disappears after you read it.
Love,
Becki

October 2, 2011
Becki,
It would be best if you told no one about this and acted no differently from before. If discovered by others, you can’t help that everyone will search for you like flies on spoiled meat, trying to get a part of it.

I’m happy for you, but not so much for me, although I may receive a lot of spoils. I have been poor and respect what money can do. I would be happy having it near and choosing not to use it. It would not hurt me much if I had plenty of riches and the Ethiopian people took it away from me again. It is a healthy way of taking care of God’s blessings. The only one I have told this to is my co-driver.
Love,
Neal

October 2, 2011,
Neal,
Yes, I know what you mean about being careful not to say anything to anyone. I am doing my best. A few people know it will happen, but don’t know the details.

When it happens, it may change many things: how people behave, relationships, etc. I am preparing to hide the situation and not let people come to me about money issues.

Wondwossen has taken on the role of the executive financial officer, and he is competent in that role. But even for him, I am cautious because I know money can change people. About myself, I learned a few things about my unacceptable behavior in the States when I was with you.

My BlackBerry fell into the toilet. My foot is dead, so I can’t dress up as nicely as I want because I must be careful with my shoes. My dress slacks are too long, so I gave them to someone to make them shorter. But she ruined them all because she didn’t know what she was doing. Another lady tried to fix them. I haven’t worn them for months because I am still waiting to fix them.

My lesson is that God taught me I spent a lot of useless time on worthless endeavors while driving with you last time. You had a right to be angry with me. Sorry. I deserved to get lessons here about it, which I hope I have learned.

My right foot is still very numb. I found a famous Chinese acupuncture guy treating my leg and foot, and I hope it heals. When I get a car, I am concerned that I won’t feel the gas or brake pedal.
I love you
Becki

October 8, 2011
Becki,
It has been five days now since I heard from you. Do you have an update for me? I don’t want to treat you like you are chasing windmills, so I have been quiet the last few days.

We have been on a lot of short runs. The next check may be small.
I haven’t wanted to say anything about your finances because I didn’t want to make you feel bad if something didn’t turn out. But I can’t wait to hear how it is all going because it is exciting to think that others are helping us. I might get my teeth repaired sooner instead of later. Also, it would be nice to shop for Thanksgiving, knowing I have enough money to get the fruit and vegetables I need.

Peter is planning to be at Wendy’s on Thanksgiving week. I want to be there, so I will ask for time off. We will be there. I wish you could be there too. I will make potato salad.

I need to sit and do nothing for a while. I forgot the last time I took time off. It was about four days, 3-4 months ago.

It would be best to think about when you could come here to see your foot, hips, and legs looked at by a doctor. If you cannot work, take early medical retirement.

It is now Friday night, and we are on a long run. I fixed tuna and onion sandwiches for my drive in the morning. I have everything I need for food in warm or cold weather. There are many tools and chains in my possession. But that is all vanity because I do not have you with me.
Love you,
Neal

October 8, 2011
Hi Neal,
Where do I begin? I wish so much I had said nothing about the potential funding. I took a few days to figure out that he had conned me. It all seemed legitimate, and the man was a true professional in what he did. He tricked me out of USD 1,000. However, the police will be on the case, and we will recover everything. (Note: The police ignored our complaint)

I feel so foolish and awful for you; I do not know what to say, except I am so sorry to get your hopes up and then dash them. God has been near me in my distress, and I hope he will be the same for you. But please do not forget, the KLM Airlines “Wings of Support” is legitimate. They have pledged about five thousand USD for materials for their first project with us. It is not money upfront, but they are with us, so something good is happening.

As for my health issue, I found an acupuncturist, a Chinese man famous among high-ranking diplomats from Ethiopia and other countries, including China. So, I feel I am in expert hands. However, I was supposed to take ten consecutive treatments (every day). I had two treatments, and then the con man needed me every day at different times of the day. Since the place for treatment was far, I could not do both, so I postponed the treatment. Now I have no money to start the treatment again, so I will wait a while. But he can cure the problem. I will let you know what happens.

I do not know what to say about any trip to the States. If I get my leg and foot fixed, I can drive again. However, I would be nervous about being gone like last time because of what problems that might happen while I am gone. No one feels comfortable here for me to be gone for long periods. I think again; we are at a crossroads. I do not know what God wants from me. I am seeking to understand His will.
Love,
Becki

October 9, 2011
Becki,
Do not worry about me. I was excited on the first day you told me about the new funding. Everything that concerns money leads to vanity, anyway.

There is a new biography about Derrick Bonhoeffer. A man had read his book called “The Cost of Discipleship.” Being told to write about it in a dream, he took documents and studied them. He saw that the letters to different people were not part of his original book. I could not get the name of it because the radio with fading in and out. Ok, you might get your computer and figure out the book. I am sure it would be interesting for you too.

He says Dietrich Bonhoeffer was raised in a liberal family and a student in liberal schools, but also was an independent thinker who came to America and became a different person from a Black church in Harlem, New York. He learned of the Jewish plight and, in Germany, spoke against the onslaught of Jewish death camps. Toward the end of his life, he joined a group of people who would try to assassinate Hitler himself. I’ve got to get that book.

Another book he wrote, “Amazing Grace,” is about William Wilberforce from England, who, regarding slavery as evil, dedicated his whole life to abolishing it.

Well, I made peanut butter and raisins for sandwiches for the time I drive again.
I meant to ask you to discuss the deaf students’ grades for a month. Have they improved?
Love,
Neal

October 17, 2011
Hi Neal,
Sorry, I didn’t reply to you sooner.

First, to answer your question for me last time, what about the students’ grades? Well, I am discovering a lot about the Ethiopian educational system.

Last year, all our 8th-grade students passed. But this year, they all failed except one. It was a disappointing and shameful time because we all worked so hard.

It isn’t easy to understand why it happened, except this year, those same students were held back in 8th grade and will be good 9th-grade students next year. All our 10th-grade students passed except one, so they can go to a teacher training college or technical vocational training. One student had good enough grades to go to preparatory school, which is grade 11, and this will prepare her to go to University. Some of our last year’s 10th-grade students stayed with us this year so they could improve their grades enough for grade 11 next year. If our students pass with high marks this year, we will start grade 11 next year at LeaMcD.

We also have a first-grade class with six students and are still planning more. Along with our fashion modeling class, we have started a sewing class with two sewing machines, and the students are doing well. We are doing so well in many of our programs.

We are pursuing the spiritual dimension again at the school. Mesfin hurt our cause because he did not keep up the early morning worship, which is an essential part of our existence. It has been hard to get most of the staff interested again, but we are doing it.

We plan to have a fellowship that may turn into a church. It is difficult for me to become as evangelical again as I once was. Things are just not the same because of the worldly way churches are these days. However, I know this: Jesus never changes. I need to pray to have boldness again.

Con men are always doing their dirty work. It’s just another side of corruption here. I thought I had a good handle on detecting cons nowadays. At least, I should with my vast experience. Knowing so much was lost to a thief is humiliating and discouraging, but we hope to recover most of it. Thanks so much for your understanding and encouragement. (Note: None of the $1000.00 was recovered. The police stood by in silence.)

It is easy to think we might be chasing windmills. I have sometimes thought that way and wondered what we are doing? I guess it comes with the territory. What we are doing is difficult. God asked us to do it for His purpose. Sometimes, it is all about refining you and me rather than the people we support. But if you are still willing, I am ready to see this through with God’s grace.

We still have many obstacles, from selfish and ignorant people who care little about the deaf. I can get discouraged, but then I see the wonder and beauty of what God has done through our obedience to continue this journey, which is unbelievable.

I am still planning for your arrival here. With the latest lousy con, I felt like giving up for a while, but God has been renewing my resolve, and I know that even though it was a con, God can do the real thing beyond what we could ever do, hope, or think. Keep on believing, keep on hoping, especially loving the Lord. We have our reward in Him.
Love,
Becki

October 17, 2011
Becki,
I am sorry they conned you. It is not the first time. In at least one way, a good thing about you. You are so much at peace with all humanity that the last possible thing you think of is the person next to you, whom God created, may use you and be your archenemy.

So, what is a thousand dollars? It is as much a liability as an asset. It is a week’s worth of work. So, do not spend more than a day or two worrying about what others may think. If they think badly of you, it is because of their imperfections. Had they been thinking correctly, they would have helped instead of conning.
We have returned to Walmart in Opelika, Alabama. It is the same place we were when I sent you that long letter about Obama.

We went to Izzy’s Pizza for dinner, breakfast, and supper. I overate. We deliver at 4:10 am Central Time; then, I drop my co-driver off for a week at home. I always like this time because I don’t need not remake my bed every day, but the downside is that I will sit around a lot.

So, are you chasing windmills? Am I chasing windmills? Are we both chasing windmills, or are our enemies chasing windmills? Maybe Covenant is chasing windmills with us.
Were the pilgrims chasing windmills on Friday, November 9, 1620, at daybreak at Plymouth Rock in the highlands of Cape Cod?

There was an Indian named Squanto. He was taken captive by the English. He escaped and was taken captive again and taken to England. After being in England for several years, he ran and found his way back to his land. Finding his homeland again, not one of his tribe was alive. They had all died from a mysterious disease. The tribes had gotten together and understood that they needed to make peace with the white man lest they all die.

When the white men landed, they found diverse fields of corn, but no Indians for forty miles, except one man, Squanto, who spoke perfect English and became a God-given person to teach them how to farm, find suitable remedies, hunt, and fish.

Less than two years later, he died, but before he died, he asked that they pray for him to go to the white man’s God. Were they chasing windmills?
Mistakes are part of the general direction of decisions. There can be no improvement without mistakes.

Samoset also helped newcomers. When Chief Samoset and Squanto marched into the camp of the new white people, the newcomers were terrified. The first words they heard were from Samoset. Raising his hand, he says: “Do you have any beer?” from a book called “What has God Wrought?” (92 pages by a Baptist minister). It is a slow-reading book, but fascinating, and has many endnotes.
Love,
Neal

October 23, 2011
Hi Neal,
I have not heard from you for a while. How are you?
I am starting treatment again on my leg and foot with acupuncture and will have therapy for at least ten days, maybe longer.

A friend has a car. She let me drive it the other day, so I know I can drive with a dead foot and even drive the truck again, but I am not sure.

Did you tell anyone at Covenant about my leg and foot being numb? Do not tell them. I know it is risky to drive again, but if I exercise better, it might work if the acupuncture succeeds.

I am thinking about turning to the States in mid-November, and I hope two weeks of orientation at Covenant are enough. Then we can spend time at Wendy’s house on Thanksgiving, and I will drive again. The only thing that will stop me is not having enough money to get back. If God opened up heaven’s windows and poured out the blessing, so we could stop worrying about finances. There might be other reasons, but I do not know why. What do you think about that?
Love you,
Becki

October 24, 2011
Neal,
Could you ask Covenant how long my orientation is? If I return in November. I want to finish my orientation classes before Thanksgiving, so that after Thanksgiving, I can get on the road with you.

Please let me know soon so I can plan the best time to come. Can I be done with orientation and on the road in one or two weeks? I am acting by faith because I hope the doctor improves my leg.

I hope I can drive again without more health problems and have the money to pay for the airline ticket. I haven’t been able to pay our rent here for at least five months. The conning and court cases have hurt our finances, but the Railway Station has been patient with us so far.
Love you,
Becki

October 25, 2011
Becki
I am in Chattanooga and wish I had read your email three hours ago. It is 6 pm here. Peggy and Nick have gone home, and it is too late to ask them now. But tomorrow, I will email Peggy and tell her your plan to be here to drive from the middle of November. I will ask them how long orientation is and what days it starts and stops.

So, you may come back and spend Thanksgiving with me? I am excited!

I am getting a new truck. It is a lot easier with you here. I throw the things in the new truck that you put in my way. But my co-drivers leave it all up to me. There will not be enough light to finish this job because the sun is going down in about 15 minutes.
I love you,
Neal

October 26, 2011
Becki,
As for your reinstatement and training at Covenant, classes are Monday through Friday if a driver has been off the truck for over a year. It will be available Monday through Wednesday if it has been less than a year.

I was told to call David two or three days ahead for reservations. Classes are never overfull. There is always extra room.

I will ask for time off during Thanksgiving from November 21 to November 28. But an enjoyable week to shoot for would be November 14 through 21st. Peter is coming in on the 22nd.

So, what pushed you over the point of driving again? Is it finances?
When was your last day driving with me? It was over a year ago, right?
Love,
Neal

October 26, 2011
Hi Neal,
I want to return to the States because I am exhausted from the battles I am fighting here. I think about you, and I have all the reasons in the world to return to the States. So, I convinced myself it was best to return. Another reason is the money issues. Instead of getting the funding I thought was coming, I got scammed.

However, in the early morning hours, after I emailed you that I was coming, I heard a sermon called “Exhausted yet Pursuing” by Gary Wilkerson. Please find and listen to it. It has addressed my whole situation and caused me to examine my motives for returning.

I should not run away from the issues here, but experiencing them on the surface makes me tired and want to return. So, I am asking you to help me work this out. If you tell me I should come back, I will. But I will if you think I should stay and stick out the battles. The sermon was powerful, as if it were preached for me.

I have told you I am coming back and want to, but if I leave now, I might be wrong. Please advise. If YOU SAY COME, I will come. If you say stick it out, I will stick it out, and maybe God’s blessing for us is around the corner. Please be honest with me. What is your gut about my dilemma?
I love you,
Becki

October 27, 2011
Neal,
I did not send the above email for a few days. I have been sitting on it. I am still interested in returning, but I do not know if I should. Today will be the 4th day of treatment on my leg and foot. It may be wrong to return if I cannot get my body well enough to drive again. So, I am waiting for the Lord to give simple answers and tell me what you think. I will send more emails soon.
I love you
Becki

October 27, 2011
Becki,
Come. Come and rest.
1. Yes, you need to rest.
2. I need you.
3. Your children need you.
4. Your grandchildren need you.
5. You need to see an American doctor about your foot, leg, and hip, and if you cannot work, apply for early retirement and social security.
6. You and I need something to fall back on when we are too old to work. Ethiopia will not be there for us unless we provide for ourselves.
7. You are more likely to find someone to fill your shoes in Ethiopia while in the United States than if you stayed there. The more times you try to find a person you can trust to run the finances and staff, the greater the chances of finding that one good person.
That will let you and me live longer and happier.
8. I have told Peggy, our dispatcher, that you are on your way.
9. We can have a week off together before you go to work.
10. I need to rest. I can rest better with you.
11. You put it in my hands, then you come here. It’s a simple decision for me.
12. I told Wendy yesterday.
13. I told Peter yesterday you gave me good news. I passed it on. I couldn’t help it. It is time to rejoice, sing, shout, jump, run in circles, and say yes!!! Yes!!! Yes, yes, yes!!!!!!!! If I were in a house now with a dog, the dog would howl, yes!!!!!!!

There is a time that the Lord answers prayers before we ask: this time, He knew what I needed.
Love,
Neal

October 27, 2011
Neal,
OK! I am coming. But today, Thursday, there was no money in our account. So far, I have no money to buy a ticket. But God will take care of it when the time comes.

I might need to stop in DC to tend to the Kidane library books issue. We are struggling to get the books. It might help if I were there. At least maybe I can get my important documents.
Love you,
Becki

November 1, 2011
Neal,
Please don’t tell Covenant about my foot problem because I want to do orientation and see how it goes.

I hope you have had a good working week, so at least $1,500.00 will be in the bank to pay for my airline ticket. I need to get it early, or the price may go up.
Love,
Becki

November 1, 2011
Becki,
I called Wendy a few minutes ago. She said the check was in a day or two ago, and she deposited it. So, this means you are coming?
Neal

November 1, 2011
Neal,
The check from Covenant will pay the salaries of the staff, but not my ticket.
Love, Becki

November 1, 2011
Becki,
Today I sewed a little on my jacket on your old coat, with the hood and zipper in front. I kept sticking my finger into the hole when I put it on, so now it is fixed, but the zipper has not worked for at least three years now, maybe longer. My next step is to find another old jacket with a good zipper, take it out, and sew it into the old coat.

I have three jackets, but I wear the old, cheap one even though worn out, because it is yours and my way of keeping you close. Another reason is that I want to know how to mend. I like the old thing because it’s cheap, light, comfortable, and free. I finished cutting off and hemming up a pair of blue jeans by about two inches. It is hard to pull the needle through where it overlaps four times. I have about 20 colors on spools of thread, a thimble, straight pins, and a pincushion.

After unloading, we are now sitting at Pageland, South Carolina.
Neal

November 1, 2011
Neal,
I forgot the first of the month, our debtors will take their share. There is $200.00 in the bank now. How much is the US Bank trying to take out? It makes it hard for me to buy a ticket. I was hoping there would be enough in our account next Thursday to return to the States by November 10.

I must stop in Washington, DC, or Pennsylvania to get Ethiopia’s important historical documents. If not, we need to get the docs to Chattanooga another way.

You must look ratty in that old coat, but it’s typical of you!

Love,
Becki

November 4, 2011
Hi Neal,
My bags are not packed, but I got my ticket today, borrowing over $800.00 from Wondwossen.

I arrive at Dulles DC airport at 7:30 am Sunday, November 13, and will be there until 10 pm when my flight leaves for Atlanta. As you can see, I will arrive early morning hours on Monday, November 14, on the shuttle to Covenant, so please call whoever and reserve my place for orientation on Monday, the 14th. In times past, I missed orientation and had to wait another week, so please do not forget to call Covenant.
Love you,
Becki

November 4, 2011
Becki,
You must be here by November 13 because the orientation starts on the 14th at 6:30 am. The shuttle doesn’t run until 8 am on the 14th.
Neal

November 5, 2011
Neal,
I’m not referring to the Covenant Shuttle, but an airport shuttle from Atlanta to Covenant, hoping they will drop me off at the Covenant Hotel. I can try to get an earlier flight, but I must pay for a new flight because it is the only one Ethiopian Airlines offers.

I may need help to get the books from Kidane’s house, so it might be vital for me to stay in WA, DC, the whole day on the 13th.

Please call Covenant, letting them know I am doing my best to come via the airport shuttle before 6 am. If I do not make it on time, they should give me a break and let me come in late. It’s not fair to miss my orientation for an entire week just because I will be late Monday morning.

We need money for LeaMcD, so I need to work again. I can get the airport shuttle to drop me off at Covenant. Are we talking about the same shuttle?
Love,
Becki

November 9, 2011
Hi Neal,
I am having a crisis at the school because the principal is acting up and not cooperating with the administration. He had done this before in September, and I almost fired him, but he begged me to give him another chance, and I did. Now he is doing it again and creating a big crisis.

It makes me sick because it is happening just before I leave for the States. I don’t know what he will do once I am in the States. I am trying to handle it wisely by removing him from his principal position and assigning him a full-time teacher; if not, he needs to leave the school peacefully. I could use prayers.

The new manager in charge is competent. We have some wise counsel from a former Vice Minister of the Ministry of Education, so I have some help, but the situation makes me feel like if I leave now, I am aiding the crisis and an open the door for more harm.

I will try to get an earlier flight from DC once I arrive at the airport. It looks like the library books in DC will be taken care of without my help. Thank you, Lord!
I love you,
Becki

November 11, 2011
My Dear Neal,
I am so sorry to give you some hard news. I had been having symptoms of brown blood after being menopausal for over three years. It happened a few days ago. I thought to wait until I got back to the States to check it out, but it got worse last night and early this morning because it was more blood and red.

This morning, I went to the Korean hospital to see what was happening. They have discovered I have a mass of tumors in my uterus. They think it is malignant, but they won’t know until they have done a biopsy. I need a hysterectomy, but they won’t do surgery until they see if it is malignant. I am doing the biopsy in the morning. It takes two weeks to get the results of the biopsy. They said they could do the hysterectomy here in Ethiopia for about 2,000.00 USD. But if it is malignant, it is better to get treated in the States.

I don’t want to go back to the States in this condition. We don’t have a support system there, and it would be an enormous burden on the kids because we don’t even have a house. So, I am planning on staying in Ethiopia. I am hoping you find out how to be here with me. Please inform Wendy and Peter of the situation. God is good!

I love you with all my heart.
Becki

November 11, 2011
Becki,
My wife, my love, my joy.
Come to Wendy’s. She has a room for you. Do not stay there. We have medical insurance. I will try to get time off. Come here soon. You have a ticket for the 13th, so use it.

Wendy and Peter are talking on the phone together right now.

Get a biopsy and then get on the plane. The doctor can email you the test results, and then you can deal with them here. Save the receipts in English. It can all be for the deductible.
And get here quick!
Love,
Neal.

November 11, 2011
Becki,
I talked to Carolyn. She said to come to the States if it is malignant. They will do another biopsy here again anyway.
Neal

November 12, 2011
Neal,

Yesterday, before I had access to the internet to write to you, I needed to make a quick decision when I was at the hospital because the time was so short for me to leave for the States, and the doctor was waiting for my answer. After considering my options, I did the biopsy here because it seemed like the right choice. When I agreed to do it here, the doctor changed my appointment from next Tuesday to tomorrow morning. As soon as I got back to my office, I wrote to you, and then I called the airline and canceled my flight.

I have asked one of our old deaf to be with me tomorrow morning for the biopsy so she can help me back to my office when it is over. It will be ok to do the hysterectomy here in a couple of weeks, and I have people who will take care of me. However, I don’t know what God wants me to do if it is malignant, and if it has spread. I will cross that bridge if or when it comes to that.

I am sorry. It seems like I am caught in two worlds. I am here, and you guys are there. I am inconveniencing everyone, no matter what I do. I don’t want that. I feel like I have always inconvenienced everyone. I don’t want that again.

Instead, please tell Wendy and Peter not to worry. God is with me and has let this thing happen for His greater purpose. I am not scared, only wondering about how it all happened now, when I was so close to coming back.

Please do not worry so much, Neal. You know everything we have been doing. We’ve believed God called us to do it. So, try to put all your trust in Him for the results. Love to the kids.
I love you.
Becki

November 14, 2011
Becki,
It’s ok, whatever you decide. I felt a big letdown when you decided to stay in Ethiopia. I am exhausted. I have only taken off eight days in the last year, including New Year’s and about six months ago.

Thanksgiving week will be me, Wendy’s family, Peter and his family, Keder and his wife, plus their three kids.
I am still planning to take next week off because I’m so tired.
I can’t go there now to be with you because LeaMcD depends so much on my financing. So, I will keep working.

Today, we have done nothing except drive 30 miles to deliver a load. We will drive one round-trip to California and Florida, then take Thanksgiving Week off. You may think I am resting now, but I cannot sleep as I need to until I am away from the truck for a few days.

Maybe in a month or two, we can drive together again.

Words do not express my actual feelings. You are so far away, and we need to be closer. It was a comfort to know that you had bought the ticket.

I hope you will be all right and that we can be blessed to grow old together.
Love Neal

November 14, 2011
Neal,
I plan to fast and pray for you to get rest and for me to be cured of any possible cancer cells. I have been at a loss about what to do, but I know how you feel about being exhausted. I am mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted from the battles here. My body is breaking down because of the problems I face here.

But God says He will not give us more than we can bear, and He will have an answer for us soon.
Love, Becki

November 18, 2011
Neal,
I am on the 5th day of my fast. It was discouraging because I bled again, but I hope it will disappear. I hope you are fine and wish I could be there for Thanksgiving. Are you taking time off this weekend?
Love you,
Becki.

November 18, 2011
Neal,
I checked out SDA Wildwood on the internet. They take no insurance plans from anyone, and they are expensive. Please tell me how much the deductible for our insurance plan is. Is our insurance still Blue Cross, Blue Shield? I am searching online for the right place to go to do the Chattanooga surgery. I can make an appointment online, but I need to know this info first because they need the deductible upfront, so please get this information for me. Since we are so tight with finances, I need to understand it.
I love you.
Becki

November 21, 2011
Becki,
Our checking account now has $934.00, and activation is tomorrow for medical, prescriptions, and dental. It will be Wednesday before I know if the emergency fund will help you. I did not tell them you were my spouse, but a driver.

I should be at Wendy’s house in the afternoon on Monday, the 21st.
I love you.
Neal.

November 21, 2011
Hi Neal,
Wendy said that Erlanger is in Hamilton County and will have a payment plan. I am finishing the 8th day of my fast. The bleeding continues. I am anemic, but confident I am on the right track. I want to return to the States in good condition, with the possibility that I have conquered the problem through fasting and prayer, rather than facing surgery because a hysterectomy has nasty side effects. I hope you are patient with me.

Clearing my head from the trauma I have been facing this past year, I realize we cannot leave our LeaMcD child half-grown-up. So, I depend on God to perform a miracle, supplying funds to keep this thing going.

An amazing thing happened on Friday. In a UNICEF debate on handwashing, among 100 schools, LeaMcD came second! The Deaf and LeaMcD have a good name. It will be broadcast on TV. Will this make up for all the bad things I dealt with this past year? Maybe!

We won Abebe’s case, but again, he is taking me to court through another route, trying to do the same thing. Satan is relentless.

Do not worry about the emergency issue with Covenant yet, since Erlanger will accept me without a bunch of money upfront.
I love you,
Becki

November 22, 2011
Hi Neal,
To pay the airline penalty by Wednesday, I need $200.00 in our account because I’m leaving for the States Thursday night and arriving in Atlanta at 2:30 pm. I am not making any promises, but I will try. Can you borrow someone’s car and pick me up at the Atlanta airport?

Covenant does not pay on Thanksgiving Day, but they pay before or after Thanksgiving. So, it will be nice to see everyone before they go home, especially Peter’s baby.

When I am sure I can leave for the States, Wendy can call a doctor for an appointment early next week.
Love, Becki

November 22, 2011
Becki,
Ok, we will deposit $200.00 into Bank of America within an hour.
I forgot what Covenant said regarding money deposited on Thanksgiving Day, but it will be after Thanksgiving.
Neal

November 22, 2011
Neal,
Thanks for the $200.00 deposit, and I will try to get to the ticket office tomorrow and do it on Thursday. I am still on a fast and do not feel well. Tomorrow I will eat something to have the energy to finish my packing. I shrunk the thing. I could do more. I keep wondering what I might miss when so many of my kids and grandkids are there, but not me. I will do what I can to make it work. Pray for me.
Love,
Becki

November 22, 2011
Becki,
Peter wants to know if you have enough money for the ticket because they will charge more for a reservation at such short notice. They will not be arriving until late this afternoon.

November 22, 2011
Neal,
I will plead to the airlines that I had an emergency, showing them my ultrasound. Maybe they will give me a break. If not, 200.00 will be the penalty. Are you picking me up in Atlanta, or should I take a shuttle?

November 22, 2011
Becki,
One of us will pick you up, probably me.
Love,
Neal

November 22, 2011
Neal,
I hope you are the one to get me because I miss you.
Hi Caleb and Seth. Their little boys’ jibber jabber is sweet!
Becki

November 23, 2011
Becki,
Please let me know your time of departure and arrival when you know.
Love,
Neal.

November 25, 2011
Hi Neal,
Here I am at Dulles Airport. I will have a flight out for Atlanta at 12:35 pm, arriving in Atlanta after 2:00 pm. Then I will take a shuttle to Chattanooga and reach there by 5:00. You need not worry about coming to get me, ok?
Love you,
Becki

Context: Becki is now in the States, in orientation classes at Covenant Transport. Meanwhile, Neal continues driving cross-country to support LeaMcD.

December 4, 2011
Becki,
How are you doing?
We shut down in New Mexico.

Yesterday, we drove through part of a shutdown, but were shut down anyway when the D.O.T. shut the freeway down.

Preparing for and conducting post-trip inspections is beneficial. I found a light on the new truck burned out on my post-trip inspection. So, we are sitting here.

December 4, 2011
Hi Neal,
Orientation is grueling, especially the backup practice and homework they give. I am exhausted. I hope the test is this afternoon. I will be ready to do the Smith System on Tuesday. I am considering going to New York afterward to get it out of the way and not worry about it anymore. What do you think? Can you hold on to your co-driver until I finish in New York? I need to call the lady and see if that is a good time for her for me to come, then I can let you know. Be safe out there.
Love you, Becki.

December 4, 2011
Becki,
Peggy planned the trip that Robert and I are on to coordinate for you. It would help if you drove with me for a while, and you and I both took a week off to do the NY thing.
Every 4 or 5 days, we will have about one day off to take it easy and have leisure time, waiting to be loaded or unloaded.

With the Smith System, know:
1. Winter driving
2. Rollover prevention
3. Skid control
4. Defensive driving
5. Space management
6. Speed management.

It takes about a half hour for each lesson.

December 4, 2011
Neal,
Ok, I will be ready to drive with you. When will you be back in Chattanooga?
Becki

December 5, 2011
Becki,
We should be back near you about the 8th. I do not know whether we will deliver this load. If we drop it, we can be back on the 7th. If we deliver the load, it will be on the 9th.

December 5, 2011
Neal,
When do you think you are coming back to pick me up?
Becki

December 5, 2011
Becki,
We are coming back after Christmas.
It does not matter what time. I could use a rest from driving like I got at Thanksgiving.

A few minutes ago, I wondered about the book I read about this man driving to a city more famous than Las Vegas. It’s about a hitchhiker who knew the road so well. I am so tired of making wrong turns, and even if I do well, I understand how tired I am of most things.

Back to the timing of that trip: it will fall into place.
I love you,
Neal

December 8, 2011
Neal,
When and what time are you coming back to Chattanooga?
I love you,
Becki

December 9, 2011
Becki,
I am at the drop yard now. If you want, and if you are awake, I will try to walk over to the Covenant Hotel. It will be at least 30 minutes until they finish at the inspection bay.
Neal

December 10, 2011
Neal,
Good morning! I know you are asleep. I don’t want to disturb your sleep.

I am here at the terminal. Call me when you wake up. Sorry, I did not get your message at 1 AM, but glad you are getting some sleep.

Call me when you get this message, or come over.
Love you!
Becki

Note: Becki did not go to the Doctor because the bleeding stopped. LeaMcD staff were waiting on their paychecks, and the Railway station was waiting to be paid several months’ rent. After several months, the bleeding returned, so Becki had surgery. Fortunately, there were no cancer cells.

The story of LeaMcD and how it was destroyed will continue in future email documentation.